Wedding Family Matters: Invite Mother to Wedding if She Doesn't Like Fiance?


My best friend is getting married in a few months, and her mother has basically disowned her. They've had a pretty good relationship in the past, but recently it has been very rocky. (My friend's mother doesn't approve of her fiance.) As of right now, my friend and her mother haven't spoken for more than a month. Should my friend send her mother a wedding invitation? Will she regret it if she doesn't?


In this kind of situation, inviting the person in question eliminates the risk that you'll regret not inviting him or her. If your friend invites her mom, she's extending a peace offering. Then it's up to her mom to decide whether or not to accept it and attend. But at least your friend made the effort, and she won't feel bad about not having done it. As estranged as the two of them may be right now, chances are your friend's mom would be devastated not to be invited, even if she's acting like she doesn't care.There will be more chance of a reconciliation if your friend does the "big" thing and sends an invitation. Then, all she can do is wait.

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My divorced parents are both remarried and get along great -- except in the presence of my father's wife. She seems to feel threatened by me, my mom, and my siblings. I found out that she is planning to wear a very revealing red dress to my wedding, probably to upstage my mother. I feel very uncomfortable about this because she will stand out in a sea of black, white, and silver (my colors). I know it sounds childish, but this is my day, and I want her to dress more appropriately. I want to talk to my dad (who will give me away) about this, but I don't know how receptive he'll be. Should I confront him or her, or should I just ignore it?

by The Knot2 min read