Bridal Shower: Optional Wedding Shower Gifts at Multiple Bridal Showers?

Q: I have friends that are giving me multiple bridal showers. I would like my bridesmaids and house party to attend them all, because I enjoy their company and I want to share this special time with them. But I don't want or expect them to bring a bridal shower gift to each wedding shower. How do I politely tell them not to feel obligated to do so? Their help and involvement in the wedding is more than enough.

A: It sounds like you already know the answer to your question: Just talk to them! These are your dearest friends, so you shouldn't be nervous about being straight and honest about this. Call each person and just say that you know it seems like you're asking a lot of them because you want them to be at all these parties, but you really just want to spend time with them and gifts are not important to you. Also, it's critical to be understanding if one or several or them just can't make all the events, especially if they live far away. Being in someone's wedding is a big job even when there's only one shower. Know that you are asking them to go above and beyond, gift or no. Don't hold it against them if they can't attend each and every party (though it doesn't sound like you're the sort who would).


Up Next
Wedding Engagement Party: When Does the Engagement Party Take Place?

We are being pressured by the mother of the groom to have an engagement party for our newly engaged daughter and future son-in-law. The wedding is a ways away, after college graduation and jobs are secured. I say throwing a wedding engagement party now is precipitous, and I would like to wait. Also, which side of the family is responsible for such a party, or can either side initiate it?

by The Knot