Allison loves to rap Eminem all night long, whether or not you are listening. Her favourite TV shows are ones she's already seen. Allison's greatest fear is getting kidnapped, although she might be out of the age range at this point. If you need a DJ and only want to listen to Wu-Tang or Tupac, invite her to your party. If you see her left eye shutting down, put her to bed.

Katherine is thrilled to add another Eminem-loving, "docile" little sister to her life. Rebecca loves Jacob almost as much as she loves a cold brew on a Tuesday night. Katherine can always count on her to get a hole dug, for legal or illegal reasons.

Katherine is Cassidy's favourite older cousin by a landslide. Cassidy wishes she was as good at basketball as Katherine. Cassidy had to go ask her dad's permission quick to be in this wedding party (he's still on the fence).

Jade has always supported Katherine's arms hanging like a velociraptor. Jade loves boobies out at the beach while old men are watching. Katherine is always so grateful Jade lent her the "wet to dry" hair straightener in 2008.

Adam has known Jacob his whole life, but Jacob has not known Adam his whole life. Jacob tries to forget the two months when he was brother-less. Adam wishes he was the muscle, but he's just the mustache. Jacob finds it very admirable that Adam doesn't let his small stature get to him.

Kane is Jacob's most trustworthy friend unless it comes to donuts injected with hot sauce or his horrible movie recommendations. Kane can always count on Jacob for a nice fade haircut. Kane swears he's Irish, but we all know he's Russian. Kane is the worlds first Delissio pizza burn victim.

Vaughn is a chocolate milk lover who is also severely allergic to marijuana. Jacob's favourite person to team up with to make fun of Kane while playing hockey, golf, video games, or chillin. Holds the world record for the highest and lowest score shot in a 24-hour period in golf history.

Brandon is the muscle but not the mustache. He always looked older than everyone else to the point where we always felt safe in a sticky situation. Brandon is known for his storytelling skills as well as rapping over sick beats. Pro-tip: don't attempt to stack his entire bedroom (including the microwave) on him while he sleeps.