"I don't think I want to date any more high school girls," I said to my friends at iHop following a recent breakup. I was a sophomore who was ready to focus on myself and my academics rather than occupy my time with girl fever. Julia, who sat at that table, would later inform me that she eyed her best friend next to her, mumbled "Welp," and awkwardly took a sip of her drink.

As 2020 roiled onward, that group of friends suddenly found itself physically isolated, but we often bonded over our online assignments, the ridiculousness of doing band over Webex, and our worries and concerns of the time. We were able to gather periodically over the summertime, and a general need for human connection outside of our families drew us closer. As the marching band season continued with four-step spacing, masks on when not playing, and "Sweet Caroline," I began to gather the subtle hints of interest being dropped to me by Julia and our friends. Assigned spots next to each other in the "stands" (the hill beside the field) for home football games, Julia and I had the opportunity to chat for several hours over the next couple of months.

I became conflicted. Julia was the kindest person I ever met, passionate about animals and science, and a great individual to hang around. She was understanding, compassionate, and sincere. I had convinced myself that I shouldn't date another high school girl, but Julia stood out from the rest. I knew she was likely into me, and I knew she was someone I couldn't let life whisk away. Then came the thought that I didn't deserve her, that she was on a pedestal I couldn't attain, that my brokenness shouldn't be allowed to taint her perfection. Of course, these thoughts were irrational, and it took a heartfelt conversation with our friend who hyped me up for me to gather the courage to ask her out.

After the last football game of the season, we walked to the parking lot together, chatting away. I guided her to my car where I offered her a date at Olive Garden (her favorite place), a stuffed llama, and a bag of gummy bears. She squealed in jubilation as she exclaimed, "Yes!" After a hug, I drove her to her car... which was a few spaces away. Regardless of the silliness, the ride meant a lot to both of us. As I drove away, I took my turn screaming excitedly in my car.

It was the beginning of a beautiful companionship. It is one fraught with me getting quarantined four times (the first literally three days after asking her out; I never contracted COVID), battling the stress of academics and work, overcoming internal fears and worries, handling a distanced relationship, and navigating effective, healthy communication with another human being. It is also one blooming with acts of service, encouragement and admiration, comfort and understanding, time and dedication, and optimism about the future. From our first kiss, to our first "I love you," to the cute photos, to the fun activities, to the ring on her finger, everything has come naturally. Julia is my best friend and lifelong partner, and I couldn't imagine the rest of my life without her at my side.

Engagement Photos

The Engagement

Dating