The first time I remember meeting Phoebe was 2018 at a summertime church Life Group picnic. She walked up unassumingly to say 'hello' to my buddy, James Gunn, whose church Life Group she had attended once or twice before. I asked James about her afterwards, however, he did not know much except what she had just shared. Phoebe was usually quiet and did not say much during his group time. Afterwards I began to say 'hi' to her when I passed her, as she ushered at church.

Around October 2018, I happened to stand behind her in the line for lunch at church connect/fellowship time. I nervously tried to strike up a conversation by inviting her to my church/life group that I attended. Phoebe then told me she was already attending 2 other church small groups. Soon after that day, I finally worked up enough courage to ask her out to coffee. She politely responded that she did not drink coffee, and she preferred not go out alone with strangers, especially single guys. She chose getting to know new people through group activities.

So finally it was December 15, 2018 when she agreed to join a group of us going to Franklin Falls for a snowshoe adventure. I intentionally arranged for her to ride in my car with my son and I. I was a nervous wreck trying to think of things to talk about. During the hike, however, she mostly hung out with other ladies, and on the way back from the trip, she was asleep in the back seat. I did not know at the time that she could easily get motion sickness in the back seat.

Couple months or so later, I was planning a personal vacation/trip to Hawaii. After a tentative travel plan was thought up, I decided to ask for Phoebe's inputs, knowing that she was from Oahu and traveled there often to visit family. Her immediate response to my plan was that it was way too expensive, and if I listened to her, she would help me to plan it more economically. She told me she was Chinese and more frugal (Phoebe's comment: LOL!) .

After several discussions, I decided to book my trip to Oahu along with Phoebe during her annual visit to see her family. I jokingly offered her a steak dinner if she could be my tour guide and she agreed. I felt somewhat apprehensive and anxious about the trip, nevertheless, those feelings were dwarfed by my excitement to visit Hawaii with her!

In April of 2019, we flew to Oahu. While there, I met many of her friends and some of her family. One of the most satisfying things about the trip was the opportunities to pray for/with many of her friends along the way. That was the greatest trip of my life up to that point. During that trip, we both discovered and experienced a lot of things that neither of us had ever tried nor done before, what I call, 'life's firsts'. Together we now seem to keep a running list of these places visited, foods tried, and new adventures. Most importantly, I am sure the foundation of our friendship/relationship was established there through our ability to pray, worship, and minister together.

After the Hawaiian trip, we were on the phone regularly for hours at a time talking, asking questions, and praying together. Eventually, I had to switch my cell phone plan from limited talk minute to unlimited talk and text. I was smitten with infatuation and began bringing her little gifts. During my personal prayers, I felt the Lord telling me to just lavish love onto her without any expectations and see what would happen, as Phoebe, at the time, merely considered me just a good friend.

I tried to create other group events/activities for us to spend more time together. Over the following months, we did many enjoyable & fun things together with friends. Eventually, as Phoebe learned that she could trust me, we started to go out to various activities alone. The more time we spent together, the deeper in love I fell with her. I loved her smile, and I loved to make her laugh. As we prayed together I really got to know her heart. We have many things in common and share similar feelings, interests, Christian worldviews, and desires in life.

Once we considered the possibility of moving forward, Phoebe sought the Lord even more intentionally for confirmation of our relationship. She inquired about what I was hearing from God about our relationship. I told her the Lord had shown me that, "It is our free choice and His blessing would be on our decision." Also I have learned over the past few years if I listen to Phoebe and pursue agreement with her, God's blessings always show up.

Since we have started our relationship, both of us have grown both closer to each other and closer to God. I am so grateful that we had each other to weather the uncertainties of the 'COVID' months together.

I feel that regardless of what we do, painting, working on cars, planting flowers, or grocery shopping, doing it together makes it all the more gratifying. I have never laughed with anyone as much in my life. Phoebe is now my best friend and I love her!

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