If You ask Lillie: In January 2023, I was at the annual SEEK conference in St. Louis hosted by FOCUS (the Fellowship of Catholic University Students). I was attending as a vendor as I was helping some friends run their company booth for OreMoose Catholic Leatherwork (check them out!). Considering this conference is attended by 20,000 people, I was meeting a ton of awesome customers each day and Xander just so happened to be one of them.

In our small talk about the company, it came up that I was about to start school again to begin my Masters of Nursing. This piqued his interest as he was a fourth year medical student, and he asked what type of nurse I wanted to be. When I shared that I wanted to be a midwife he was taken back a bit and immediately asked me my opinion on home births. He shared that his sister-in-law wants to have a home birth (shout out to Grace!) and he just can't wrap his head around it as a fourth year medical student. I shared how I love them and think they can be a great option for some women. He proceeded to remember I was working and how now was not the time for his off the wall question. This is when he apologized and then slyly asked me if he could get my number and if I would be open to meeting up and discussing further when I was not working. And of course I said yes as all my stubborn self was really thinking was how I could school this medical student in birth.

Well when I shared this with my best friend (and maid of honor!) Natalie, who was also working the booth, she thought there might be more of an interest than just talking birth haha. Boy, was she right haha! We met up the next day and went to the Arch (where Xander brought our his Air Force ID for admission and that piqued my interest haha) and home births did not come up for over an hour. After what was supposed to be a conversation about home births over coffee turned into a whole afternoon of exploring St. Louis, I found myself hating how much fun I was having with his charming self. He made it obvious that he was more interested in getting to know me than he was home births and I tried to make it obvious that I wasn't interested in a man who lived across the country. Yet, he was persistent and kindly asked if I would get coffee with him the next morning before the conference ended. When I met back up with Natalie smiling ear to ear, she encouraged me to be open and meet up with him anyway. He expressed his desire to see each other again and I again expressed my desire of not doing the whole long distance thing.

A few days later and I get a call where he eagerly says he would be "in my area" in the next week for a residency interview and would love to come take me on a proper date. When I asked about "my area," he said Cleveland, OH. I just laughed as this was 7 hours from Milwaukee. Yet, again being encouraged to stay open by my amazing friends and now bridesmaids, the next thing I knew he was in Milwaukee. He rolled up to meet me at the Milwaukee young adult Mass and adoration night still in his suit from his interview and with red roses in hand. He was such a gentleman from the beginning, sitting me down, clearly stating his intentions, and letting me know I could ask him to leave at any time if I wasn't interested. I again found myself having so much fun, laughing, having great conversation, feeling very seen, and admiring his love for the Lord. The next thing I knew, we were coming up with a plan to see each other again. And from that visit forward his eagerness, persistent pursuit, selflessness, and faith led us through navigating long-distance as a nursing student and a surgical resident. Fast-forward a year full of flights, adventures, and growth, he pulled off the most intentional and beautiful surprise of an engagement on the feast of the Holy Family in January 2024 in the same church we are to be married in! Our story is only one the Lord could orchestrate and I am excited to continue to see what the Lord's will holds for us as we enter into the sacrament of Holy Matrimony!