In November of 2016, Christopher and I were juniors in high school. We attended an Avett Brothers concert together because nobody in our friend group at the time were fans of them. At this concert, a lot of big stuff happened. I got to see Christopher in awe of his favorite artist and develop this new internal drive towards music. That was the first time we'd really spent time with one another. I recall leaving and my mom explicitly asking me "So what's going on with you and this boy?" To which I adamantly insisted there was nothing going on. Looking back, there was absolutely something going on, but I'd continue to deny that for a while! Throughout the rest of 11th grade we attended several concerts together. Some with friends, but some with just us. We went for coffee nearly everyday after school. We spent the majority of our free time with each other. If you know Christopher, then you love him. I don't know a soul that doesn't because he is the most kindhearted, calming, patient, and good-natured person I know. I was no exception to falling in love with Christopher. HOWEVER, because I was a teenager I obviously could not let him know this no matter how reciprocal I felt the feelings might be. Just before our senior year, I finally confronted this dance we'd been doing, to which Christopher took the position of "I like you, but I do not want to date you." What are ninny, right? Anyways, I wanted to close that door so badly and move on and date around and be happy. I did date people I thought were the opposite of Christopher, but the entire time I had the voice of Ezekiel James Exline in the back of my mind- "He's just scared. Don't give up on him." And subconsciously, I never did. Eventually I had heard that he regretted telling me he didn't want to be together. I swiftly broke up with the person I was seeing. I can really remember how unsure I was. This information was months old at this point and Christopher couldn't still feel that way, right? Well, I was actually too scared to ask him outright so I just assumed he didn't. But that STILL did not help me move on. Through the entire year of dates that we never actually called dates, I kept a journal of everything I desperately wanted to say to Christopher but was too afraid to. I thought that only way I could really move on was if Christopher knew everything. So I shakily gave him the journal and rushed out of the library (a usual place for us to grab coffee after school). We spent hours on the phone that evening. I remember explicitly thinking and truly believing that if we could get past whatever teenage nervousness we had, this would be it. This would be the real deal. We were best friends. We knew everything about each other. We loved each other, even if only platonically in the moment. We did get past it, and it absolutely has been the real deal for the last 6 years. I recently had a conversation with a friend about how much fun it is to get "swept up" in the beginning of a relationship, all lavender haze and rosy eyes. We still create moments where I feel just as swept up in us as I did when I was a kid. It is, quite literally, a dream come true to be marrying Christopher.

In large part, this started with a series of calculated betrayals by my friends. Throughout high school, Analee and I grew close as friends. We also had several mutual friends with whom we were very close. With closeness comes trust and with trust comes confiding. One particular friend, my best man, Zeke, was not one to keep a secret to himself when it served my better interest. So, for the months spanning mine and Analee's late-junior and early-senior years of high school, I would constantly spill the beans to Zeke about how I was maybe, perhaps, somewhere in my mind, crushing on Analee. Zeke, being the great double agent that he was, would then go and discuss the matter with Analee. Once he knew the feelings between me and her were mutual, I believe he got to planning. One moment I remember being particularly pivotal in me realizing I liked Analee for real was after we had gone to a concert with Zeke, Kayla, and Ethan. We all rode 3 hours together to see a band we liked. On the drive back, Analee volunteered to stay awake with me while I drove. Zeke, Kayla, and Ethan all fell asleep in the back seat. In the front, our conversations were so genuine and trusting that I felt safe sharing anything other than the fact I was catching feelings for her. As that summer went on, she and I started hanging out a lot more, sometimes just the two of us. Eventually she decided it was time to talk about it. I was standing in my driveway and she was in her car. She asked if we had any direction, or if we were just leading each other on. Because, deep down, I am a weenie, I said I didn't want to date her because college was gonna come soon and we'd be apart and blah blah blah. Pretty dumb. As soon as Analee started showing signs of moving on (externally, at least), I realized I had made a mistake that I might not be able to take back. According to her brother Matt, with whom I had woodshop, I didn't look too well in those days. I remember trying to convince myself into making peace with it, but my friends definitely saw through it. It was after her birthday party one day, when I was driving back with Zeke, Kayla, and Ethan that I had told those three that I was pretty torn up about saying I didn't want to date her, but there was nothing I could do about it now that she was dating someone else. None of the three of them were big fans of the person Analee was dating at the time, so they went back to the planning boards, behind my back. Analee and I kept in touch through this whole time, though the conversations felt a bit different. THEN, she broke up with her boyfriend on Thanksgiving. After THAT, the conversations started to feel a bit more similar to the ones we would have before. About a week later, she wanted to grab coffee after school, which was not unusual for us. So we went for a normal "homework" and coffee-talk hang. Only this time, she gave me a journal of some of the stuff she had felt over the past year. Dated and all. The next night we called and talked, waiting for a good chance to bring up the book. We finally did and decided to officially start dating. Fittingly, the main betrayer and architect behind us ending up together shares a birthday with our anniversary. In the 6 years since then, we've built our relationship on trust and commitment. And I've realized that sometimes, when your friends go behind your back, they do it so you don't miss out on the love of your life. So, thank you, for betraying my trust in my best interest.