Our story is one that is primarily about the sovereignty of God and His unfailing love and provision for His people. We met online - we're both part of a Facebook group for Christian singles. (We promise it's really not a dating site - neither of us joined the group with any intention of dating someone - but we get it if you don't believe us.) It's a site where Christian singles can support each other in the unique challenges of being single in the Christian church, challenges that most married couples don't quite understand. There are several smaller chats on Messenger that have spun off from this group, making it easier to get to know people apart from the massive site, and both of us were in one of these chats together.

Erica: In 2023, I found out that my favorite Christian artist, CityAlight, would be providing the worship at the Gospel Coalition Conference in Indianapolis that fall. I got a group of people from this Facebook group to road trip to the conference with me, and this group included David (after much convincing). We'd been online friends for several months before the conference, but this was the first time I'd met David in-person. I'd had a few people ask me about him, but I'd never considered him as a romantic interest because I wasn't sure what he thought about moving overseas for missions. That was a dealbreaker for me, and I was pretty convinced I’d be single for life, because single men in missions are rare to find.

David: I had "seen" Erica around that Facebook group and although I did think she was cute, I also had no interest in attempting anything long distance so I gave it no further thought. In February 2023, Erica reached out to chat about something and we ended up chatting online for hours until she had to go to bed. From that day forward, we began to chat more regularly. Over the next few months, I began looking forward to getting a message from her as those conversations would go on for hours and we would chat about everything. On a mission trip with my high school students, I found myself constantly messaging her to process the trip and that's when I began to suspect that maybe I had stronger feelings than I thought. Erica reached out to invite me to the Gospel Coalition conference and after much persuading, I finally relented. I figured, "Hey, I'll meet her in person, it will be fun, and I can convince myself that it's just an online crush and move on."

Erica: I left the conference with considerably more books than when it started, and feeling glad to have met David in-person. I was thankful to have such a great front-seat passenger for the trip, but I didn't think about anything much beyond that, except that one time we became Insta famous thanks to the TGC account.

David: I also left the conference with considerably more books than when it started. As we made the 8 hour drive back from Indiana to Minnesota, I sat in the front with Erica and we spent the entire ride talking. I really enjoyed my conversation with her and how easy things seemed to flow. When I landed in Portland the next day, the first thing I did was send a message to a couple of friends and said, "I think I'm in trouble." My spending time with Erica over the previous few days had definitely not quelled any feelings I had had.

David: I didn't know what to do with how I was feeling after the conference. On one hand, I knew that I couldn't keep chatting with Erica the way I had been without letting her know how I was feeling. On the other hand, I had no reason to believe that Erica reciprocated these feelings. Plus the odds of ever seeing her again in person were basically none. However, once again, God was at work behind the scenes. I got a last minute invite to a wedding of a mutual friend of ours. I reached out to Erica and let her know that I was happy to pick her and some other friends up at the airport and drive them around. I also tried to sneak in some one on one time with her by inviting her to go visit Powell's, but the timing didn't work out. The Tuesday before that wedding, I opened up to my life group about everything that was going on. We spent over half an hour just talking about my situation. All of them encouraged me to ask her out. The worst she could say was no. They prayed for me and I decided that I would try and find an opportunity at the wedding. It was harder than expected. Erica was always talking with someone and I didn't want to ask to talk alone in front of other people. I quickly prayed and said, "Alright Lord, if there's an opportunity to chat with her, please open it up, and if not, I'll just go home and that will be that." A bit later, Erica excused herself to use the restroom. I decided to wait in the lobby of the church and try and catch her when she headed back to the reception. I pretended to be very interested in the guest book until she walked by. This was my chance.

Erica: I came out of the bathroom, saw David, and knew instantly that something was up.

David: I asked Erica if we could go talk outside. I shared my feelings with her and made sure to acknowledge what I knew were her non-negotiables. I told her how much I had appreciated talking with her over the past few months and how I had really enjoyed my time in Indianapolis with her. How her godly character impressed me. How easy and comfortable it was to talk to her about anything and everything. The whole time I was trying to read her face to see if I could get some idea of how the conversation was going, but Erica had a great poker face and I got nothing from her facial expressions.

Erica: I was panicking internally, because I had friends who were trying to set me up with a friend of theirs in Florida, and I had plane tickets two weeks after this to meet him.

David: Erica thanked me for being brave enough to put myself out there and said she wasn't saying no, but that she needed some time to pray. That sounded good to me so I told her that she could take her time. As I drove home, I felt peace about the situation. I had done what I needed to do and even if she said no, I had at least put myself out there and didn't need to spend time wondering "what if?" I spent the rest of the evening watching Spongebob with my roommate and his girlfriend.

Erica: I spent the rest of the evening and my flights home trying to figure out what to do. Eventually, with wise counsel from some close friends, I told David that I thought I needed to follow through on my commitment to go to Florida in a few weeks. He responded very graciously, wishing me well and wishing nothing but the Lord's will for my life.

David: I had told Erica and another friend that I would drive them back to the airport on Sunday morning. I picked them up and it was an awkward car ride for me. To her credit, Erica continued to chat with me during her travel day and it didn't feel awkward at all. Two days after the wedding, Erica reached out saying she had had time to pray and think and asked if we could talk. We video called that night and she told me about Florida man and I told her that I sincerely hoped that she would have a great time in Florida and would be praying that they would have a good connection. I still cherished Erica as a close friend and I genuinely wanted what the Lord wanted for her even if that meant closing the door on any romantic prospects between us. I told her that if for some reason it didn't work out and she wanted to explore the possibility with me, that I would be around. When we finished the call, I once again felt a sense of peace knowing that my life was in God's hands.

Erica: But even then, David's grace and kindness and care made an impression on me, with how he responded to a situation that hadn't turned out the way he'd hoped.

David: For me, that was the end of the story.

Erica: I was getting ready to head to Florida two weeks later, when I received a message from my friends down there that this guy they'd hoped to set me up with...wouldn't actually be there at the same time as me. They were very apologetic (and very annoyed at their friend's apparent self-sabotage), but I could see pretty quickly that this was God's hand at work in our lives.

David: I reported back to my life group about everything that had happened and they were very supportive. (If you're not part of a small group/life group at your church, get plugged in! They are amazing!) They jokingly said they would pray about the Florida guy being boring or not showing up. A week later, I was getting ready for life group when I got a message from Erica asking if I had checked my email. I went and saw a LENGTHY email from Erica where she told me about how Florida man wouldn't be in Florida after all, and how she felt that this was God pushing her in a different direction. She brought up how much my friendship meant to her. She still had concerns she wanted to address, but she said that she was open to me flying out to Minnesota to take her on a date.

Erica: I had a lot to consider. Those who know me well know that I have wanted to move overseas for missions work within a year or two of finishing graduate school, and that this was a dealbreaker in any future spouse. He had to be excited about serving God in a different country and culture and about making Him known among those who have never heard His name. I knew David was a pastor and had a heart for teaching others, but I'd never heard him express a desire for overseas missions, so I was hesitant and cautious. However, to his credit, David had expressed this when he first approached me, knowing that it was a dealbreaker for me, and saying he was very open to the idea, had seriously considered it, and would never have approached me if he wasn't willing to have that conversation. It showed me that he knew me well and had taken the time to genuinely pray through these considerations that were important to me.

David: After several conversations over the span of a few months - with each other, with our church families, with mentors, with friends - after a lot of prayer, I bought a plane ticket to see Erica in Rochester in December, and then Erica came to visit me in January, so I finally got the chance to show her Powell's. During that trip, I asked where she was at emotionally and she said that if I asked her to be my girlfriend, she would say yes. I did and of course, the best way to celebrate that was by going to get ice cream for dessert.

Erica: Over the next year, we were able to make visits to each other about once a month. We continually saw the Lord at work in our lives, directing our steps, most especially in clearly denying me jobs in Minnesota and providing a job in Oregon. David came to Minnesota to help me celebrate my graduation, I took a three-week international trip to visit some friends, and he proposed shortly after I returned, right before we made the long drive to move me out to Oregon.

David: From the very beginning, both of us had established that we would be intentionally praying about this and that if we felt the Lord leading us away from each other, we would be honest about it, even if it hurt. As Erica said, we saw the Lord's hand at work in so many different ways. As two individuals who have established deep roots in our respective communities, we knew that it would have to be the Spirit clearly guiding us if one of us was going to uproot and move. 2024 did not end the way I expected it to. Although I had already been certain that I wanted to propose, that certainty was solidified when I ended up in the ICU and saw that Erica's response was to put her own life on hold and fly to Portland to be at my side from morning to evening. It was in that hospital room that I knew for certain that I couldn't let this wonderful woman leave my life.

Erica: David is under strict instructions never to pull that stunt again.

Throughout the highs and lows, the joys and difficulties, it has been made abundantly clear that the Lord has sovereignly orchestrated every part of our lives to bring us to this point. We have seen His hand so clearly at work, and we are grateful for His provision and guidance in our lives. We invite you to join in celebrating the Lord's grace and kindness to us and in worshiping Him above all.

"Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever." - Ephesians 3:20-21