Jonathan & Tabitha
Jonathan & Tabitha
Our Story
How we met!
HOW WE MET
Jonathan and Tabitha grew up in Southeast Asia because of their parent’s mission work. Their worlds collided in a small Christian international high school in Singapore and their friendship developed through their mutual friends and interests. After graduating from high school, they continued to maintain their friendship.
HER STORY
First impressions
I was a new girl at school. While my classmate was giving me a school tour and the low-down on who’s who, I distinctly remember seeing him walk through the canteen with a certain presence about him. I asked my classmate, “Who is that?” She told me his name was “Jonathan Hane” (as though people around the school were casually known by their full names) and I remember thinking “What a strong name.” I quickly learned that his good character and reputation preceded him.
The first time we actually met, Jonathan was speaking to our mutual friend and I was distracted by a mosquito conveniently situated on his right bicep. As any sensible person would, I promptly slapped him with the intent to kill that mosquito and he was stunned. I like to think I left a good impression.
Friendship over the years
As time progressed, we discovered what C.S. Lewis described as this “secret thread” of common interests between friends. A continual sense of “No way! You like this too?” - from music to journal articles, to poets and spoken word artists, to sharing meaningful opportunities and being a source of encouragement to one another. Our Facebook chat slowly became an ongoing exchange of our favorite things.
The day before Jonathan left Singapore for college, we met up for frozen yoghurt. I was surprised to find that it was just the two of us (I was under the impression he was bringing his friend along). This was one of the few times I was able to spend quality time with Jonathan. Our time together resonated with me deeply as we shared our stories with one another. I remember thinking how incredibly rare and special he is.
While we continued to keep in contact over the years, the distance and uncertainty of where our Lord would lead us in the years to come made it difficult for us to move beyond a friendship as we were constantly in different places. Although this caused some hurt and confusion at times, we cared for each other deeply. While I had no idea how God would bring this man back into my life, I prayed for Jonathan often. Just knowing he was alive in some part of the world being a bright light made it easy to thank God for creating such a wonderful human being!
Philippines 2020
Before the world went on lockdown, Jonathan had an opportunity to return to the Philippines for some non-profit work. During that time, I was working for an NGO in Manila. Jonathan and I spent some quality time over the course of the month doing service trips into nearby villages, going for fitness classes, enjoying meals together, and having the luxury of time to catch up in both groups and 1-on-1 settings. I loved that even after 7+ years of knowing Jonathan, he remained steadfast as a person and in his faith.
I will never forget speeding through hilly roads on a tricycle after a fun day trip to Daranak waterfalls. Jonathan stopped the trike to get us coconuts (“buko”). While zipping through traffic on the back of a cosy three-wheeled tricycle, Jon was making me laugh so hard because the bumps in the road were causing me to spill the contents of coconut juice onto him. It was silly and chaotic and I hadn’t laughed from my belly like that since my dear older brother passed away. I remember thinking that I would treasure this exact moment with my friend for a lifetime.
Dating in 2022
When Singapore reopened towards the end of 2021, Jonathan returned to be with his family. This also allowed us to reconnect. After being invited to go for more outdoor runs, game nights and fitness classes, I started to wonder whether Jonathan had feelings for me.
Before he left for another trip in February, he invited me out for frozen yoghurt. The day concluded with us having the most open and honest sharing of our feelings for one another at Raffles Place train station long after the trains stopped running. Although it felt scary and uncertain because we were unsure how our paths would come together, we felt confident that this friendship was something worth building. The next day, Jonathan flew off for a 3-month mission trip in a remote place.
From the moment we started dating, we already knew we would like to get married. The intentionality of Jonathan’s pursuit in our dating season brought me a resting sense of peace and joy. 2022 was happily spent “dating” and deepening our friendship over the course of FaceTime calls, voice notes, video and text messages, and flights between Thailand and Singapore.
- Tabitha
HIS STORY
When I first saw Tabitha in high school, I remember being so taken by her beautiful smile and bright attentive eyes - and confused about where she came from! She was new on campus and joined halfway through the year. So to me, it felt like she had just appeared out of nowhere and I was so determined to find out more information about this little surprise and wanted to talk to her.
Because we didn’t share classes and had mostly different friend circles, she was always just a little out of reach. But I would treasure the brief conversations we’d have in the hallway or after school. I have special memories of occasionally Wednesday nights when I would play basketball at school with a group of dads and other students and she would sometimes come with her father to sit and do homework while he played. Needless to say, I was quite distracted during those games.
Throughout high school, we developed a dear friendship. I had always had feelings for Tabitha but struggled to articulate them especially when school and our college choices took us separate ways. In college, we didn’t communicate much, but I was always checking in on social media accounts to see how she was doing.
Things got more serious for me in February 2020 when I spent a month working in the Philippines. Tabitha was also there at the time, volunteering with an anti-trafficking organization. This was a dream come true for me, I finally got to spend all this quality time with Tabitha, really seeing her heart come alive through her passions and gifts, catching up on each other’s lives the past few years and making fun memories together in the Philippines.
While I still had not told Tabitha about my feelings for her, I left this trip more confident than ever that this was the girl I wanted to marry. In fact, on my last day there before I flew out as we were hanging out together still as ‘friends’, I snuck this photo of Tabitha, beautiful and radiant as ever, because I knew from this point on I was confident I wanted to marry her and wanted to remember this moment together.
Unfortunately, immediately following this trip was when COVID hit and all travel shut down. But in December 2021 I could return home and we reconnected then.
I still hesitated to share my feelings with her because I valued our friendship deeply and didn’t want to risk hurting that. However one evening after going for frozen yoghurt where my debit card was declined and she had to pay for the both of us :), we shared about our feelings for each other and where we wanted this relationship to go. While still not officially dating, we spent the next 3 months calling and talking nearly every day, sharing about our lives and what we were doing.
On June 18, I asked Tabitha for the privilege to pursue her heart and officially ‘date’ her, and with much bribery and coercion she finally agreed. And here we are today, preparing and celebrating the greatest blessing of my life, the privilege of marrying this incredible woman and making a dream come true!
- Jonathan