Sometime in December 2021, the algorithms that excel at finding new and unique ways to screw up our lives, unscrewed — against all odds — those of two unsuspecting young Kentuckians.

On a bright white screen somewhere in the Greater Lexington area, Kathleen ("Katie") Upton was presented with the warm visage of a charming journalist. He seemed interesting. Multi-talented, worldly, not too self-serious. Not too short, I guess (he maintains that if you round up, he's 5'9; that's allowed). A certain joie de vivre to that one.

Over in Frankfort, John Austin Horn stopped his doomscroll session short when he spotted a medical student from Danville and... Spain? Interesting enough? Check. Cute enough? Check.

She was more than cute enough. Walking into their first date at Greyline Station, he saw her first, from afar. She was so beautiful that he had to veer into the bathroom before she spotted him so he could collect himself. A few breathing exercises and some unnecessary attempts at peeing (like a dog getting ready to go hunting or a runner about to tackle a grueling 5K) and he grew at least calm enough to fake it. He had always thought that when other people told these kinds of stories, that they were exaggerating for the sake of flattery or building a narrative out of an otherwise mundane relationship. Now he believes.

She was more than interesting enough. They talked about her time in Spain. They talked about books like "The Master and His Emissary." They talked about growing up in small towns not too far away. They talked about dumb stuff (at least one poop joke was exchanged) and made each other laugh — all the way to Al's Bar, where they beat another couple four times in a row in pool.

She was also INTERESTED enough. Interested enough, that is, to overlook a textbook first date blunder. At the apex of the date — jokes landing, strong eye contact and body language, never-ending conversation —Austin got a text from his best friend. Another fellow named Austin (who had texted the other Austin earlier that day encouraging him not to push the date because she "could be [his] wife one day,") wanted to know what he was doing. The Austin in this story, defying all logic and common courtesy governing first dates eggs his friend into joining he and Katie at Al's.

Archived text messages reveal that the Austin who should have been focused on his date asked: "Gonna come out?" A response: "You with that girl? Should I come to Al's?"

One word: "Ye."

They all stood around near the back of the bar for about 30 minutes, not really talking much anymore but exchanging some awkward laughter before calling it a night.

Somehow, a second date occurred. Austin Huffman came to that one, too (by design this time). Then a third, a fourth and we're probably working on something like number 279 now.

This couple has many people to thank for their journey, but Austin Huffman is first among them.

Well, they grew to love each other in a way that transcended those first date jitters (and blunders).

They started going steady. They got through:

- multiple life crises

- tragedies of various magnitudes

- big ol' tests

- adoption of a beloved hound dog

- the medical school grind

- moving in together

- a handful of crazy election seasons

- life

When asked what he loves about Katie, Austin gave the following reasons ("including but not limited to," etc, etc):

- Katie's spirit of inclusion

- her big ol' laugh, which involves every part of her body

- her "mysterious" eyes

- she has very good taste when it comes to design

- how much, and how fiercely, she cares about the people she loves

- she's very active, just like me

- Katie likes to laugh at dumb stuff, just like I do

- how prepared she is in all circumstances

- she's a complete person, with a lot of different interests, despite the single-minded demands of medicine

- she cooks good

- she is the most beautiful person (regardless of gender) in the whole wide world

When asked what she loves about Austin, Katie gave the following reasons ("including but not limited to," etc, etc):

-his way of speaking and telling stories

-the manner in which he keeps up with his friends and makes his people feel important and thought of

-how his smile lines take up his entire face

-his love of music and movies

-his banjo and guitar serenades

-how active he is/one of the best running partners there ever was, aside from Sulley Upton and Megan Sherwood

-his shared love and knowledge of Zelda, and also sports...aka he is the perfect combo of nerd and jock that we've all always wanted

-his desire to try new things and see new places

-his look of mischief and mischief managed when he's playing a joke on me or a friend, or his poor mother

-the way he practices journalism, i.e. he creates a product that people from both sides of the aisle can read and talk about on a shared basis, instead of only speaking within their separate slivers of reality

-the fact that he attempts to hold power to account "on the daily"

-his ability to engage and spend focused, quality time with me and those around him otherwise

-his propensity to match my cackle in tone and volume

-the fact that he will be a stellar dad

We are here because we lean on each other, we challenge each other and we love each other unwaveringly. We want to do this for the rest of our lives, and we'd love for you all to come down to Lexington to help us celebrate that choice.