It can’t rightfully be called a meet cute. Parker and Ryli’s story began the way that most children generally acknowledge the existence of other children. They don’t remember if they first met in elementary, middle, or high school, but they attended the same youth programming at First Family Church—singing, playing games, and learning about the love of Jesus.

Parker and Ryli traveled with their church’s high school youth group to Jamaica and Germany. Dan and Renni (Ryli’s parents) chaperoned the trip, and the care-free kiddos spent many wonderful afternoons riding in truck beds in lawn chairs, river rafting, serving local families, prayer walking, playing “what are the odds?,” and acting in skits for children and teen Bible camps.

Parker and Ryli’s paths diverged for a number of years. They each went to separate universities, Parker to DMACC and Ryli to Drake University (Go Bulldogs!). On occasion, Parker and Ryli would stop and chat at Salt Company events when she attended with her friends.

First Family Church started a young adult ministry in the spring of 2022. Ryli had finished her Master’s program in teaching and began teaching Spanish at Centennial High School. Parker graduated with a degree in photography the year prior and was a barista at Blue Bean. It was a time of transitions.

They both saw this as a great opportunity to plug in with a strong community, serve, and fill a need that was missing in their church to reach college-age students.

Some highlights from the ministry included retreat weekends where they saw community deepen, weekly small groups to dive into the Word and pray for one another, Thursday night after-hours worship jams, many of our friends placed their faith solely in Christ, and others encouraged Parker and Ryli to faithfully pursue their individual walks with the Lord.

Parker and Ryli made many memories together. From funky dress-up days, to rock climbing with friends, to a swing dance night at the church (you can probably guess who danced together), they started a friendship that allowed them to begin to recognize the God-loving, selfless, and kind traits of the other.

Interest and attraction blossomed. As the gentlemen organized an elaborate Galentine's dinner in February of 2023, Ryli's heart began to flutter. Little did she know, Parker had been patiently taking note of her character for months and preparing to pursue the godliest woman he knew.

That spring, they served together at a church in Kentucky and prepared for a summer overseas.

It wasn’t in God’s timing yet for Parker and Ryli to date. They were content to just be friends for the summer. Two nonstop months of seeing exactly how the other person reacted in times of stress or sorrow or exhaustion gave a pretty vulnerable and transparent view into the life and heart of the other person. It was revealing and confirming. They spent many mornings strumming guitar, cooking eggs with veggies for their teammates, and talking about what they had learned from the Word that day.

They sang karaoke, toured art museums, hiked, shopped at bazaars, tried new and crazy foods, and jumped in freezing alpine lakes. They made life-long friendships with locals, grew deeper in their faith, and experienced a culture that left an indelible mark on their perspectives.

By the end of July, Ryli and Parker were smitten.

At last. The long awaited first date finally arrived. After months of observing one another, serving teammates together, and finding compatibility in their sense of humor, work ethic, joyful demeanor, and most importantly, love of the Lord, Parker invited Ryli to a local Thai restaurant for lunch on August 9, 2023.

Neither of them had talked together about dating before. In their hearts, both Parker and Ryli secretly sensed that this could potentially be one of the most significant relationships of their lives. They breathlessly hoped the other felt the same.

When they each arrived at the restaurant, any nervousness slipped away as they began to talk about Ryli’s family vacation and Parker’s barista adventures of the past week. Over bowls of crispy peanut chicken and pad thai, their eyes communicated that they were invested and cared genuinely, their laughter bubbled across the table, and their hearts, which had already slowly, propitiously, began to intertwine for many months, quickened their pace.

Parker gently led the conversation in a new direction. Ryli beamed as he described to her in much detail how patiently he had pursued her long before she was aware. Since October/November 2022, he watched and grew increasingly certain that her character was of high moral integrity. By the Christmas season, he had intentionally inserted himself in her circle of friends and spent time in groups to continue to learn more about her interests and dreams. In the new year, Parker was already taking notes on his calendar of upcoming occasions in Ryli’s life as she mentioned them so he could ask her more intentional questions when they greeted one another at church, at Campus Collective, or at their Central Asia meetings to prepare for the upcoming 2-month trip. A spring break trip to Kentucky brought a surge of feeling and excitement as they energetically did work projects alongside one another to tidy up the facilities. And their summer affirmed his decision and continued to reveal just how sweet it was to talk deeply about their faith and daily Bible reading with one another, harmonize their voices in worship of the Lord, and recognize Ryli’s hidden talents: instantaneously building deep friendships with new people, crossing cultures with grace, and caring for children. He explained that he had sought counsel from at least three older men from church to ask their advice on dating, marriage, parenthood, and living as a godly leader.

After outlining these and many more reasons why he cherished her, Ryli could hardly suppress her resounding “YES!” until Parker finally asked her “Will you be my girlfriend?”

Now it was Ryli’s turn to gush to her new boyfriend. Feeling beyond blessed to be in this relationship, she eagerly gave the backstory. Parker’s servant-hearted nature was apparent to her from the time he joined the leadership team, but it was highlighted when he organized the Galentine’s dinner in February that year. The brotherly love he showed by grocery shopping and preparing homemade gourmet recipes, valet services, and waiting on tables was eclipsed by the greater purpose of the event: to show all the women of Campus Collective that they are valued daughters of the King, beautiful and forgiven in his eyes, and sisters who they desire to serve in the name of the Lord. It made Ryli melt a little. She noticed his humility to show up early for music rehearsals, work diligently, and spend hours voluntarily scheduling, recording, and editing photo and video content for the ministry. She saw his overflowing joy and singular attention on any one person at any time he entered into a conversation. And she appreciated the special attention he showed to her while also honoring her as a man above reproach.

In short, the lunch was AMAZING!

As they packed to go Parker said, “Now that you are officially my girlfriend, would you like to go on our first date?” What a surprise!

He had three locations selected and tucked into individual sealed envelopes.

1.) Rose garden and DSM art center

2.) Vintage thrift and records store

3.) Molly’s cupcakes

It was already turning into a marathon date. But one last thing must be done. It was JD Davis’s 60th birthday that day, and per his request, Parker and Ryli joined JD and Lori for dinner at Hickory Park to celebrate the momentous day! The new couple was surprised when they arrived to find freshly printed photographs from their date that Lori had ordered that afternoon. They chatted about their summer in Central Asia over barbecue and went back to their home to open presents and share more personally. What a warm welcome Ryli felt!

Over the ensuing months, Parker and Ryli actively pursued one another, savoring the idiosyncrasies and quirks as well as encouraging the strengths in the other. They continued individually leading small group Bible studies for guys and girls at their homes on Tuesday nights, leaned into wise married couples for guidance, volunteered at church, and generally had a lot of fun together whether with family, hanging out with friends, or going on dates.

Now, Parker and Ryli love surprising one another. It’s a rare date-planning gift they possess. They plan elaborate day-long itineraries including everything from candle-lit string quartets to archery and from the Latino Heritage Festival to attending Broadway performances. They match each other for vitality and stamina, as well as in thoughtfulness to each other. Whether it’s a simple hangout at the kitchen table to help Ryli finish grading a few more papers, or a white boarding session to write goals for the upcoming months, even timely tasks become a treasure. Many a handwritten note has been read and reread by the well-loved recipient. A shared love of cooking spices things up in the kitchen when they experiment with unique recipes such as octopus and chorizo tacos, hand-plucked roasted pheasant, and Central Asian Laghman. The thread connecting these is the wonderful time they spend together in constant tender care of the other.

It’s safe to say that there was never a dull moment in their first 9.5 months of dating before returning to Central Asia, and they continued to find even more reason to kindly and patiently wait on each other serving and being served.

Round two. You may wonder why the couple chose to sacrifice another summer: fundraising, enduring long layovers and lost luggage, and giving up several months of potential income. But both Parker and Ryli, independently of the other’s decision, felt completely convinced and convicted by the Holy Spirit. This was how they were supposed to spend their summer. They would return to the same mountainous and warm-cultured city for a second time, engaging in cultural exchange while volunteering at an English club. They returned to a metropolis that felt like home and to friends that felt like family; they returned to a church where they’d been personally challenged to mature and change; they returned to a place where Parker and Ryli’s affinity for one another had been forged within the purifying fire of the accountability of community and the solidarity of commission.

As a small team of three this year, it became clear to Parker, Ryli, and their teammate Grace, that God was at work in their hearts to unify and strengthen them. Through mornings together in the Word, song, and prayer, they bore one another’s burdens of exhaustion and mental fatigue and the newness of navigating relationships with our AMAZING, intelligent, hospitable, and caring local friends, as well as rejoicing together when something spectacular happened inside of those relationships! The people are the real reason Parker and Ryli revisited Central Asia for another seven weeks.

Building off of the vulnerable and valuable relationships from the previous summer, Parker and Ryli hit the ground running with deep intentional friendships They also saw Grace bravely introduce herself and establish rapport with locals. On the very first day we arrived, three of Ryli‘s best friends surprised them for lunch at a favorite restaurant. Other highlights of the trip included two-day trips to surrounding villages to spend time learning local customs and culture with families, hiking in the mountains, team breakfast every day, Parker and Ryli’s weekly date, attending church on Sundays, and (a personal favorite of Ryli’s) opening the doors of our apartments on Fridays to invite local friends to cook and share a meal with us, as well as sing and talk about really important things. Parker was a strong leader for the team and worked unremittingly to ensure Grace and Ryli were emotionally and spiritually supported, as well as taking a servant’s position (willing to carry groceries or Ryli’s backpack) at any possible opportunity. They all served each other, and were in turn served.

It was a refining summer relationally as well. As Parker and Ryli began to talk about the future possibilities and personal development, they contemplated how their goals aligned and noticed affections deepening.

God had a clear plan. Parker and Ryli, with considerable analysis and discernment, made unified decisions about the fall. These resolutions all came with a level of peace that surpassed understanding. And for what they didn’t have an answer, they trusted that the Lord would lead and guide them and answer their prayers that He would align their hearts and desires to His will for their lives.

Parker is deliberate and caring, actionable and expressive. It was only to be expected that he plan the most beautiful, intentional, and memorable engagement. Parker had spent months anticipating this day, Sunday, July 28, 2024. Everything was ready. Now it was time for execution.

Ryli awoke on this day blissfully ignorant of the behind-the-scenes work happening, yet intuitively sensing that something good was going to happen within the next week. She knew that she had only been back in the state of Iowa for two days, but Parker had a plan in the works. She woke at 6:30 AM anticipating a sneak attack proposal before or after church, but only found her sister, Alia, diligently working on her computer for the upcoming school year. Later Ryli was shocked when nobody was rushing her as she put the finishing touches on her make up in her bathroom. She knew how much it irritated her mom and sister when she made them late for worship service. But she didn’t think too much about it. After church, her family had reservations with her cousin Charlie to go out for lunch, and then go thrift shopping at Stuff, etc. that afternoon. She put the finishing touches on her makeup with a small cat eye and grabbed her shoes and Bible and ran out the door.

Alia suggested Ryli invite Parker to lunch at Bubba’s, a southern comfort food restaurant in Des Moines. Parker sent a quick text back saying he already had plans with his cousin Jayden for lunch to swing by Chipotle. The alibi worked! Ryli did not suspect a thing.

Meanwhile, Parker was on duty at the church to ensure the live stream functioned properly during both services. He prepared a tea the way Ryli likes it between services, and handed it to her with a warm good morning greeting as she entered the sanctuary. It was truly a perfect day. It was perfect in the way that Ryli had no idea how it was going to unfold, and how both of them so tenderly cared for each other.

What a sweet reunion to see so many familiar faces after a summer in Central Asia! To hug and talk with so many friends warmed Ryli’s heart. The sermon began, and Ryli couldn’t help but wonder at the timeliness of the illustration in Travis‘s sermon. He likened the transformed Christian life— alive in Christ—to the transformation of identity, virtue, and community experienced immediately after one’s wedding vows. The bride and groom don’t go back home to sleep in their parents house. Instead, their lives are changed forever. Similarly when we become alive in Christ, the Christian does not return to live their past life. But now their lives are marked with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, patience, forgiveness, and love. Everything changes.

Parker knew what he had to do. He was settled and certain. The pieces were in place for the imminent engagement, and his helpers knew their tasks and roles. Yet, he couldn’t help but watch his soon-to-be fiancée with a new depth of admiration and an excitement as he’d never experienced while she lifted her hands in praise.

After the service, Parker wrapped things up at the church while Ryli dined on grits and Cajun eggs Benedict with her family, walked to a coffee shop, and showed her cousin the beautiful Surety hotel. Parker had things to do and places to be. He drove himself to meet the photographer who would undetectably capture the important moment with great discretion and finesse. Parker was in position. He eagerly awaited Ryli‘s arrival.

Ryli hopped back into the car after a fun afternoon with her family in Des Moines. She remembered her mom had mentioned moments ago that she needed to change her shoes before they went thrift shopping. That dashed Ryli’s hopes of being engaged today. She reasoned in her head, there’s little chance that her family would go thrift shopping on such a momentous day. However, the vigorous reapplication of lipstick from Alia and Charlie told her otherwise. They talked and laughed and sang in the car to keep Ryli occupied, but it began to dawn on her that she recognized this Des Moines neighborhood.

Nervous energy built up as Parker watched the small tracking dot on his phone approach the rose garden behind the Des Moines Art Center. This was it! It was finally happening! Ryli was in transit, and it was now or never. The car pulled into the parking lot where he waited for her. All the anticipation rolled off his shoulders into a wave of collected calm the moment he opened the car door and took Ryli‘s hand to walk her to the garden.

Parker began talking. He told Ryli all of the ways he sees her as a godly woman, discipling, reading her Bible faithfully, being quick to forgive, and living humbly. He told her about the long process of deepening their friendship. He told her that after their first summer in Central Asia he could hardly wait to ask her to be his girlfriend and to continue pursuing after her heart. He loved learning about the things she loved; he loved spending time with her; he loved receiving counsel and encouragement from her, and he loved giving her those things in return. Parker described in detail the moment when he became unwaveringly certain he would marry her. It was a day when he went home, looked around his bedroom, and thought to himself “I would sell everything I own to buy a ring for this incredible woman.”

Ryli‘s favorite part of the proposal came when Parker told her that she is the only woman he wants to pursue, the only woman he wants to provide for, to protect, to care for, to serve the Lord alongside, to start a family with, to grow old with, and the only woman he wants to love. He told her of her beauty inside and out. And at the end of the proposal, Parker told her for the first time that ultimately he loves her.

Parker took Ryli by both hands and looked in the eyes as they stood on the stone pathway near the hedges in the July heat. Then he took a small green box out of his back pocket, went down on one knee, and asked the most important question of their lives “Ryli, will you marry me?” To which he received an instantaneous and exuberant “Yes! For the rest of my days! I love you, Parker.”

He slipped the gorgeous marquise diamond engagement ring on her delicate finger, a ring that Ryli believed was far beyond Parker‘s price range. She truly did not know how he did it. Then Parker stood, leaned in, and shared with her the sweetest and most sincere first kiss. Both were a little timid, but sure they wanted to share this moment together. Ryli had so much excess lip gloss from her entourage that she had to wipe a few sparkles off of Parker‘s lips.

The remainder of the afternoon they were both floating on air. Walking, talking, laughing, twirling, dipping and kissing their way through the rose garden, Parker’s photographer friend captured the fun and excitement of their proposal. THEY JUST GOT ENGAGED!

Parker and Ryli took a moment alone to soak up the surreal feeling, quietly and pleasantly reflecting on the gravity of their mutual, lifelong decision.

They hopped into Parker‘s red car, and wound their way back to Ankeny, talking so rapidly of the flurry this day has been. How wonderful! Parker had a plan, he said they would go announce the good news to each of their families.

When they arrived at Ryli‘s house, SURPRISE! over 25 people were there for a surprise engagement party! Family and friends filled the kitchen, even some who had driven there from out of state. The happy couple went around greeting their loving supporters, enjoying a meal together, and expressing their gratitude to everyone for being there.

After a few hours, the party dwindled, but never died. With the women’s Olympic gymnastics team competing softly in the background, Parker and Ryli made a few phone calls to some people who couldn’t be there. The happy couple still could not fully wrap their heads around the idea that they were engaged! Later that evening after everyone had said goodnight and goodbye, Ryli mused by herself, “I get to marry this brilliant, hard-working, loving, adoring, gentle, kind man whose life resembles Christ. I cannot wait! Thank you, Jesus!”