We have a lot of milestone dates in our relationship, but the one that we count as the beginning of it all, is November 12, 2022. Why? Because it was the very first text, the thing that started it all, despite us not knowing then, that it would lead us here. Quy waited a good year to text me after hearing about me and when he did, it was with these very smooth, well thought-out words:


Hello Thuy! This is Quy, Phu’s friend. Hope I am not bothering during your cruise


Grammar was a little off but ok, he was nervous I bet, so I can let that slide. At the time, I was at my company’s annual convention and didnt have any hope or thoughts about this going very far, but because he was a good friend of Phu’s, I figured we could chat and see where it goes. If there was no chemistry, I could let him down gently and say, “I’m sorry, I just can’t do long distance” and everyone could go on their merry way! No harm, no foul.


So we start chatting. Very nice guy, funny and surprisingly, conversation is easy and I find myself glued to my phone, chatting and giggling away. I was traveling to California for my good friends Hai and Ly’s wedding two weeks after we started chatting and suggested we meet up for tea when I went down to the OC afterwards. Ly thought it’d be a good idea to take Quy to their wedding as my date and I said, “Hmmm… noooo, that’s way too much pressure!” Better to enjoy the wedding with my friends and meet up with him another time.


So we chat away via text and he tells me he will meet me in San Jose where the wedding is, because his family is there and he’ll use the opportunity to see them too. I said, “No thats too much driving! We can meet up when I’m down south after the wedding for lunch.” He insists, and we make plans to meet up the day after the wedding for a hike but he lured me out before the wedding with the promise of playing some vball in Santa Cruz (my kryptonite!!). I did have some reservations because I thought, What if he kidnap– err I mean, do I want our first date to be me sweating and running around smashing balls in his face vs. a dainty me at a tea shop, coquettishly batting my eyelashes and being deceptively sweet and demure? HELL YEAH! Yolo. Volleyball in Santa Cruz at 7am it is!


The next morning, I woke up a little early, anxious and a bit nervous, because at this point, we’ve only texted, no phone calls, no FaceTime, nada. So to ease my nerves, I went for a brisk walk outside and did a loop before I came back to the lobby. I sat down at one of the tables to wait for him and a few moments later, I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turn around (everything is in slow motion now ok, stay with me) and my long, luscious locks cascade to the side as I look up and our eyes meet and I think he is stunned by my beauty, and he’s gonna tell me! But instead, the first words out of his mouth are:


“Wow, you are REALLY tall!”


I know he meant to say “gorgeous” or “divine” or “mesmerizing” but sometimes he gets his adjectives mixed up so that’s ok. But then I looked down and he had a bunch of peonies in his hands, wrapped in cute pink paper and I melted a little (a lot). My favorite.


Less than a year later, I used that same ribbon from that first bouquet to tie my courthouse wedding flowers.


And that’s how it all began! If you want to know how our first date went, let’s just say he did not kidnap me and I unleashed the “hammer” on him playing vball, subtly showing him who will wear the pants in the relationship. He was both in awe and very scared (as he should be).


Quy ended up crashing the wedding after all, and we had our second date hiking the next day, where he slipped about 5 times so he could try to hold my hand. I didn’t offer assistance once, just noted this guy is hella clumsy. He even forgot to close his rear car door and had to run back to close it and forgot which direction the car was parked. He thought he blew it, but here we are!


I had originally just planned to meet him for tea when I got to the OC, but I ended up seeing him very day I was there and so began the v-drama that would set the stage for this momentous day.


...but there’s more!


Before I met Quy, I decided there were 3 must-haves for my future husband (and I regret I wasnt more specific) but they were:


1) Must like to play volleyball
2) Must love fish sauce
3) Can eat garlic


As you can tell, I am very tough and discerning when it comes to qualities to look for in a life partner. When I told Quy what was on my list, he said, “What the..! That’s like every Viet dude out there!”


Lucky for Quy, I did not like Viet dudes until I met him and as it turns out, he’s a better volleyball player than I am, can slurp fish sauce, and as a kid, used to eat raw cloves of garlic as a SNACK.


God delivered.


(See what I mean about wishing I had been a little wee more specific?)


But really.. What I didnt tell him that I was looking for, was someone who was super kind, more than me, and someone who was truly decent. Someone who was loving, would understand my culture, honor my family, and cherish me fully and without reservation. Someone I could lean on and was gentle and patient in the way he loved me.


And God did deliver.


He gave me someone who has dedicated his life to healing, whose easy demeanor makes it fun to be around and whose love for his family knows no bounds. Phu didn’t lie when he told me Quy was one of the best people he knew and for the first time in my life, I feel like I’m the lucky one. (But he’s luckier!!)


For anyone wondering what was on Quys list.. It was even tougher than mine:


1) Has legs
2) Likes him back


Very picky this guy. Lucky for him I have both my legs and told my friends, “I like him A LOT!”, so I guess I’m it!


We are both so lucky to have found each other and we can’t wait to celebrate with all of our favoritest people in July!