Kelsey: I’ve been in active youth ministry since my own teen years, and off and on through my gap years and college. Fall 2025 marked 10 years in a row, and roughly 20 years overall in youth ministry. I can easily say that before Jason, the youth received the best of my life.

I had also been single for 13 years before meeting Jason, and they all knew it.

So in February 2025 when the youth discovered I was in a relationship (“With a BOY?!”) there was an understandable ringing of bells, unflattering jokes about my age, and a unanimous expression of territorial joy. They said how excited they were to get to know him, to threaten him, to see if he was worthy of my love...

One of the 10th grade girls (hereafter called “Joy”) marched up to me and Jason after church and fearlessly demanded:

Joy: “I want to know what your intentions are with my Babysitter Mentor Friend Person.” (My official title.)

Jason, putting an arm around me: “I’m going to marry her.”

Joy: “Have you presented yourself to the Council?”

Jason: “Yeeeessss-“ *Sees me shaking my head.* “-Nooooo.”

Joy: “I will convene with the Council, and we will decide your challenges.”

Me: “We eagerly and humbly await the Council’s verdict.”

*Joy struts away.*

Jason: “This is going to be very dramatic, isn’t it?”

Me: “Oh I really hope so.”

After church, I approach Joy, solemnly.

Me: “Assemble the Council.”

Joy: “Give us two minutes.”

Cue her running around the Parish Hall and grabbing as many youth groupers as she could find. A few were already leaving, but when they were informed they were about to threaten my boyfriend, the parents eagerly delayed their departures.

I took Jason’s hand and we approached the 10th grade girls who had formed a half circle, with their siblings and families surrounding them. It was clear the youth were excited, and their families were slightly braced for the impending dramatics and intimidation, worried it might be too much for Jason.

My boyfriend is a reenactor. He got on his knees, and with all the pomp and ceremony the occasion required, he began:

Jason: “Oh great and benevolent Council-“ *Pause as the families loose their minds and the youth straighten up, glad somebody was finally appreciative of their status.* “I humbly come before you, asking for whatever challenges you have for me so that I may earn the blessing to take this fair maiden’s hand as my wife?*

The challenges were as follows:

1. A sonnet of Jason’s love for me (“Sonnet lengthed.”)

2. A manifesto of his intentions, including at least 10 things he liked about me (“If he could think of that many.”)

3. Presented to them on a date that they were invited to (“To see if he had any romantic technique.”)

We arranged for a picnic in Highland Park in July. Jason secretly (and very very obviously) had planned to propose at the end of the Council Date, but after going ring shopping he didn’t want to wait an additional 1.5 months. He proposed in my apartment's stairwell with a paperclip he had fashioned into a ring, two days before the actual engagement ring arrived and several weeks before the Council Date. Upon learning that he had asked me to marry him before they gave blessing, I appeased the masses by promising to give both rings back if he failed the challenges. So no pressure.

The Council ordered us to dress the parts of a princess, and a suitor vying for my hand. We were to come and subject ourselves to the mercy and judgement of the FAIRY Council.

In the end, 5 girls were able to come: Joy and fellow 10th grader Elizabeth, and three youth group graduates: Esther, and Joy’s older sisters Ruth and Ariadne. They were decked in various levels of Renaissance fairy glory. Esther had woven ivy vines into her clothes. Ariadne had allowed her sisters to do her hair and makeup. Elizabeth made herself wings.

Jason and I are very old and were very tired: I found a pretty dress and a tiara from the thrift store, Jason threw a vest over his shirt and wore his Civil War Reenacting officer saber and we called it a day. Still, I think we looked pretty cute.

Jason performed his Herculean tasks with heroics and bravery like the champion that he is, before a judgmental Fairy Council as they openly took notes in a black bound journal.

… Jason kept getting stuck on the details and ultimately didn’t write one.

He DID however present a beautiful sonnet written by Elizabeth Barrett Browning. The girls, milking the date for all it was worth, instructed him to kneel as he read aloud:

How Do I Love Thee? (Sonnet 43)

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.

I love thee to the depth and breadth and height

My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight

For the ends of being and ideal grace.

I love thee to the level of every day’s

Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.

I love thee freely, as men strive for right.

I love thee purely, as they turn from praise.

I love thee with the passion put to use

In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith.

I love thee with a love I seemed to lose

With my lost saints. I love thee with the breath,

Smiles, tears, of all my life; and, if God choose,

I shall but love thee better after death.

Esteemed women of the Council, it is with profound reverence for the Church of Ascension Youth’s legacy that I insist in your blessing to take the hand of Kelsey Regan Nienna in marriage. I present to you in this manifesto the intentions and motives for marrying Ms. Nienna. I am asking that you listen to my purposes and judge for yourselves whether I am fit to be Ms. Nienna’s husband.

I met Ms. Nienna on Saturday 21st, 2024 at Elizabeth Schwab’s and Amy Foster’s house during a Christmas Party. It was here that I ran into this amazing and beautiful woman while discussing a philosophy book with her and a few friends. Throughout the party, she and I would continuously bump into each other and have small chats, but it wasn’t until I was about to leave that I saw the true beauty and wonders of Ms. Nienna. While putting on my 1851 Pattern Federal Overcoat to leave, Ms. Nienna asked if my coat was based on a coat worn by a character in the show, Alchemist, an anime show. I told her no and explained to her it was an 1851 Pattern Federal Overcoat from the Civil War. This led us to having a conversation about the Civil War, slavery, and the politician William Wilberforce who ended the Slave Trade in the British Empire. After this short, yet wonderful conversation, we exchanged numbers and decided to get coffee upon my return from the Christmas break.

On January 11, 2025, Ms. Nienna and I met at Arriviste Coffee Shop on Ellsworth Avenue in Shadyside. We spent over three to four hours talking and getting to know each other. Sadly, I had to end this joyous occasion as I had to take a friend out deer hunting. We decided to go out on a second date, the following Tuesday to the National Aviary. After that, we kept going out in the form of physical dates and intimate phone calls. Finally, on February 13, 2025, while making dinner with her, I declared my intentions of being exclusively faithful to her in the form of dating and romance. In simpler terms, I asked her to be my girlfriend. She graciously accepted my humble request and we were in a monogamous relationship until June 16, 2025 when I made a ring out of a paper clip and asked her to marry me. She joyously said yes, but we both knew that we would need confirmation from the Council. It is with this summary of our past relationship that I now present my reasons and intentions to the Council to see if they approve of my request to take the hand of Ms. Nienna in marriage.

My reasons for marrying Ms. Nienna are the following:

1. Faith: The most important factor of finding a woman as my wife is her faith in Jesus. Ms. Nienna’s faith is beyond extraordinary. She has walked a life devoted to our God, Jesus Christ, and has made it her life goal to leave a legacy for His Kingdom and Church. She has done this in her job as a sign language interpreter, cupcake baker, and youth director. The fruit of the Spirit is obviously within her and I desire to marry a woman whose faith pronounces the love of Jesus to all who come within contact of her.

2. Character: Ms. Nienna’s faith has greatly, if not completely, affected and produced her character as a person. She is kind, gentle, loving, understanding, empathetic, and humble. These traits found in her character make her into who she is as a person and woman. I am looking to find a woman who possesses these traits. I have unsuccessfully courted women in the past, but none of them possessed the character traits as fully as I do in Ms. Nienna. I have yet to find a woman so devoted to others in my life.

3. Pastimes and Views: Ms. Nienna and I align with many viewpoints and pastimes. We both love history, sewing, being outdoors, and reading. Additionally, our political and theological views align almost completely. There are some minor differences in our theological views such as me being of Reformed Theology and her being of nonreformed Theology, but we have been able to either work through or overlook these minor differences. On a whole, our views align, and that is extremely important in finding a spouse.

4. Looks: Ms. Nienna is a woman of beauty. I do not wish to go into explicit detail or description, but Ms. Nienna is very physically attractive and very pleasing to the eye. Every time I see her, my heart skips a beat out of infatuation and attraction. To have a beautiful woman such as Ms. Nienna as my bride would be a true treasure and honor.

Now I have stated my reasons for pursuing Ms. Nienna, I will state my intentions in marrying her.

1. Building a legacy for Christ: Marriage is the closest relationship we as humans have which reflect God’s love for the Church. It is a self-sacrificing relationship where each member of the bond serves the other one. It is this, along with keeping Christ at the center of the marriage that presents a monument for God’s love for His people. Ms. Nienna and I intend to use our marriage to reveal Christ to others and to draw others closer to Him.

2. Taking Care of Ms. Nienna: I intend with all my earthly heart to support, love, and cherish Ms. Nienna for the rest of my earthly life. I plan to love no other woman nor have eyes for any other woman. I desire to use my life to make Ms. Nienna joyful and happy. Of course, there will be times where I cannot make her happy, as this is the nature of all humans being sinful, but I want her to feel loved and supported the rest of her life. I will financially, emotionally, and physically protect and provide for her if given the right to marry her.

3. Procreation: Our LORD Jesus Christ commanded Adam and Eve to be fruitful and multiply across the Earth. I also intend to do the same with Ms. Nienna. The world is devoid of Half-Korean Half-Scottish people, and I intend to make a difference in this issue with the help of Ms. Nienna. The world needs more Half-Korean Half-Scottish people in the world. Ms. Nienna and I have a duty to Jesus and the world to produce more wonderful Korean Scottish hybrids. Additionally, aside from creating a family biologically, Ms. Nienna and I both have expressed a desire to adopt children from every nation and tribe into our family and raise them in the love of Christ.

In summary, I have described the humble beginnings of mine and Ms. Nienna’s relationship, my reasons for wanting to marry her, and my intentions with her in the future. It is with this manifesto presented before the council that I ask for their blessing in the hand of Ms. Nienna for marriage. I ask now that the council dismiss and discuss amongst its members their final decision, and whether I, Jason Timothy Smith, would make a suitable husband for Ms. Kelsey Regan Nienna.

Jason Timothy Smith

As the Fairy Council scribbled notes, and murmured how he technically had not completed the first challenge, I saw it was my turn to defend our love. I requested of the Council permission to read a poem *I* had written, and asked them to consider the words as they made their final verdict.

It was a poem Jason had never heard, telling the story of how I fell in love with him.

“You’ll Just Know.”

Written Tuesday, April 8, 2025. 1:43pm

I’ve never liked that phrase: “You’ll just know.”

Like it’s some sort of formula

A message in clouds

Or a click in the mind like a piece falling in just so.

And there wasn’t a formula.

No moment of zing or sudden clarity.

There weren’t fireworks or an inner “a-HA!”

Rather a million and one deposits.

A hundred to want know him.

Another to want him to know me.

A thousand to care for him, and let in Trust

1,001 to laugh so hard it hurt.

1,002 to cry in front of him.

1,003 to show fear

1,004 to bitch about work, and introduce him to my mom.

To have ours and my first kiss in the hallway.

A million to sing and dance in the kitchen with him

A million and a half to tell him I still missed my dad.

After while, Trust brought its friend Love, asking if she could stay.

Trust vouched for Love, promising not to force, trick, or coerce.

And when allowed to visit, Trust and Love brought a peace that let me doze in his arms for the first time.

Arms that warmed me steady

Hands that lingered only in places he had already asked to touch,

Well within safe limits, never wandering or causing my sleepy body to fear it may be called to defend.

A steady heartbeat

A gentle breath

Interrupted only long enough to kiss my forehead.

And Trust asked if Love could stay, and I agreed.

When she asked to speak, she breathed out a simple “You feel like home.”

He responded how he’d like to come home to this every day, and I dozed more, silently wishing he could stay, someday.

Tiny deposits continued.

A billion and one to say out loud “I love you” for the first time in his arms and him responding in kind, twice, with a kiss on my forehead in between.

And somewhere in between 1,000 and 1,000,000, my heart quietly said “Oh, it’s you. I hoped it would be. I’m glad.”

And I continued my own deposits

Making us tea

Knowing how he liked it

In a mug I had bought from Goodwill that was now his favorite

And I brought his tea and my cocoa to the couch

So we could watch Bluey, Spongebob, Chowder, and South Park

And he kissed my hand

And I just knew

The challenges completed, Jason and I were dismissed as the Council discussed our relationship. We stood among the trees, praying our love would not be cut short by power-hungry teenage girls who may have seen Jason reciting the works of Barrett Browning as "cheating."

“The council is honored to accept and acknowledge Jason Smith as a worthy suitor and partner to our gracious Lady Kelsey Nienna.

In addition to your most honorable and well-articulated displays of love and loyalty, our verdict is informed chiefly by the knowledge that you are the Lady Nienna’s own beloved choice, which we respect above all others.

We officially bestow upon you the blessings of the council.”

Jason was instructed to kneel and surrender his sword to Joy who, drunk on her own power, knighted him. I was brought beside him as one by one, the Council Fairies came forward and gave us their individual blessings, and a hug. I was not the only person crying.

Laughter- that your days may be filled with joy, few tears, and many stunning moments. (Elizabeth, 15)

Good communication- that you will understand one another, have little misunderstandings, and you communicate your care for one another effectively. (Esther, 19)

Fertility to have your half-Korean half-Scottish hybrid babies, that you find success and grace in the adoption process, and that you may trust God and one another without fear. (Ariadne, 21)

Resilience and tenacity- That when hard times come you cling to God and one another, and come through it stronger than ever before in your faith in God and love for one another. (Ruth, 19)

Loyalty- That you will remain true to one another, that your love will only grow deeper day to day, for as long as you both shall live. (Joy, 15)

Ruth then pulled out her ukulele and serenaded us with two love songs she had prepared in anticipation of our success, and Jason and I danced beside the picnic blankets, overjoyed that our marriage was permitted to proceed.

We packed our blankets, went to the nearby ice cream shop, discovered it was closed (on 1pm on a Saturday?!) and pilgrimed to the local corner store. As she girls plundered the ice cream freezer, Jason and I (who were off sugar and NOT happy about it) found fruit flavored water that looked promising.

As the girls feasted on ice cream, Jason and I victoriously sipped flavored water that turned out to be the most horrendous tasting liquid ever conceived by man. Seriously, it tasted like sharp frozen plastic going down, and had a cripplingly depressing off-brand La Croix aftertaste. We tried swapping flavors with one another but mutually thought the other’s tasted even worse, somehow.

The day was fun, silly, but above all really moving. When Jason and I are married and start a family, it’s great to know the kids will already have some really great Fairy Godmothers.