Was once banned from Venmo for using an unnecessary acronym. May or may not be on CIA watch list.

When the clock strikes 12AM, she speaks in tongues.

At a whopping 5'0, she's the tallest woman in her family.

Closed eyes, full heart, flailing arms.

Watch what happens in a room with Ranch, Metamucil, and Hanson.

How ever many hot dogs you think he's eaten this year, it's more than that.

Wants to give a speech really badly, so we made him be the officiant.

Doesn't enjoy puns. If he tries to engage you with puns, he's just testing you.

Still has not seen the Statue of Liberty.

A great friend, but an even better slumlord.

His monotone delivery is very effective at convincing you that you'll like tequila this time.