Melissa and I met under some of the most uncertain of times. We literally fell in Love in the Time of Covid.. (yes, I did get the domain based on the Gabriel Garcia Marquez novel).

Flashback to Sept 2020 - things were….strange, to say the least. I had recently moved to Orange County, and we were all in COVID lockdown. No one could go out, we had to wipe down our groceries and packages, and we walked around with bottles of hand sanitizer, (some of us still do). Since we couldn’t go out and organically meet people, I figured, why not try a dating app (Hinge for the win). Melissa and I matched fairly quickly, and after chatting for weeks, we finally decided to meet in person. We agreed to meet at the Anaheim Packing House, which conveniently, was close to where I lived.

On the day of our date, Melissa almost cancelled. I did a poor job of following up, and she was unsure if we were still on. Luckily, she still agreed to meeting up.

Our first date was lengthy - I believe it was about five hours.The conversation flowed easily, and we quickly found common interests. We laughed over our shared love of travel, adventure, and the outdoors. Melissa asked a lot of questions, and I could tell that there was a connection.

As the night came to a close, I walked Melissa to her car. We hugged and said our goodbyes, but I knew that this was just the beginning of our story.

I was in my second year of my doctoral program. I was taking three courses, was teaching a couple online classes at a different college, and had just become our faculty coordinator in my department, leading the virtual transition. My responsibilities had me glued to my computer screen for about 12-14 hours a day. Although the world was shut down, I needed something fun and completely outside of my routine to look forward to so I decided to reactivate my dating app profiles. I thought to myself, “it’s been a while since I’ve flirted with anyone...I’m gonna practice.”

Since my intention was to practice, besides filtering for obvious mismatches and those with questionable values, I matched with a number of great guys. Josue was one of them. His profile gave the impression, “This guy is nice” and I hadn’t seen him before on Hinge. Quickly after matching we had a short but nice conversation and he quickly asked me to grab drinks later in the week. I agreed.

But then...crickets... I did not hear from him until hours before our scheduled time, "Hi. Are we still on for today?". I responded something like, “I have plans because I hadn’t heard from you.” (Lies). We rescheduled for a little later than originally planned and met up for drinks.

After I noticed that he came down from his apartment to meet me, I was guarded, “if this fool thinks I’m coming back to his apartment after, he’s trippin”. I then quickly sent my classmate who lives in Anaheim my location lol. Nevertheless, as I observed Josue’s gentleman behaviors, and listened to his many stories, I lost track of time. I was at ease, even at peace, with this feeling like I was home. After five hours I went home feeling intrigued and wanting to know more.

The next day, I had a different date planned. Although the guy was nice, the date was horrible and I kept thinking, “I’d rather be with Josue.” My date asked me if I wanted to grab dinner to which I let him know that it is clear we are not much of a match but I had a great time (lies). I left that date, texted Josue and asked him if he had eaten yet because I was in the area (lies) to which he replied, “I just made beans” confirming that I made the right choice... I love beans! Little did I know, that was my last first date and the beginning of a beautiful relationship. I wasn’t intending on starting a relationship, my concept was it was crazy to add one more thing to my already full plate. But God’s timing is perfect and I’m so grateful Josue won me over.

We continued to see each other, and I knew within a few weeks that I was getting to know someone very special. Sometimes you can just feel it, and within those first few weeks, I stated those words as natural as saying my name. She didn’t return the courtesy. In fact, it was several months before she would say I love you, and when she finally did: she didn’t stop.

Through our travels and adventures, and we had a lot, I felt a sense of peace with Melissa. We traveled to mountains, glaciers, volcanoes, beaches, rainforests, etc, and in exploring some of the most beautiful places in the US and beyond, we continued to communicate openly and honestly. Being forced to spend 24 hours with a person, you would think we’d fight. We had occasional disagreements, though, mostly because she was hangry or she hadn’t had her coffee yet.

Most of our developing relationship was unconventional. We never went to the movies, or did “normal” date stuff. We went on trips - we were forced to speak to each other, forced to have meaningful conversations. And through those series of moments where everything just clicked into place, I knew that this is the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.

I’m gonna be real with y'all...I knew Josue was the Lord’s choice for me when my inward being was settled and full of peace. If I’m being honest, this came in layers, over time, and I didn’t find full rest and peace until the recent past.

I fell in love with Josue in a small moment about four months into our relationship. He was in the kitchen making me an omelet and seemingly out of no where it hit me...I love that man. And it wasn’t just because he sprinkled hot cheetos over it like finishing salt. Falling in love with him wasn’t a result of a romantic gesture or date, or getting emotionally swept up in the beautiful background of one of our trips. It was the awesome realization that came after hundreds of confirmations that this man is worthy of my love. I didn’t tell him right away, I told him the week following and as he has already said, I haven’t really stopped.

I knew at a young age that although very important, love is not enough to maintain a marriage. I also have known that who you choose to spend the rest of your life with, is the biggest decision you will ever make. Therefore, after falling in love with Josue, I unfortunately experienced a lot of internal, self-inflicted pressure and anxiety to “figure out” whether my relationship with Josue was intended to be the last. I went through a process of detailed consideration and observations, many conversations with Josue, prayer to the Lord and fellowship with the members of His Body--often seeking peace, seeking answers. I was concerned that my anxiety was robbing me of my joy. The more I fell in love with Josue, the more Josue loved me, the more pressure I felt.

What stayed consistent, stable, reassuring, patient, caring, and safe was Josue. I always had a safe place to be open about inward concerns. Once Josue learned how close and important my relationship was to the Lord (which was around week 2), I was often encouraged to pray and to fellowship to find peace. Referring to the book “The One Thing” Josue would say, “Your one thing is the Lord. If you don’t take care of that you will always be off-centered”. To say he’s a supportive partner doesn’t fully cover it.

While the immense stressors of my life situation and the anxiety that came from understanding the gravity of who you choose to spend the rest of your life with were altogether present during my time dating Josue, my joy was not robbed but made more full. As I grew to know Josue’s person and all that that entailed, I received thousands of irrefutable proofs that came from conversations, observed behaviors, meeting his tribe, and thousands of conversations to the Lord that culminated in peace.

While to some, my side of the story might not feel romantic, to me it’s perfect. I am choosing to commit to this man whole-heartedly not because of an emotion, but as a result of a very informed choice, an inward being full of peace, with a love infused with God’s unconditional love as a result of knowing with full assurance that Josue is God’s choice. Whatever storms might come our way, I can testify that Jesus is sleeping on our boat (Luke 8).

As our relationship progressed, I knew that it was moving in the direction of an engagement. We had gone ring shopping, and I had a pretty good idea of what she wanted, but HOW it was to happen fell fully on me. We had a few trips planned, and while proposing in Patagonia or Cinque Terre or Florence, Italy sounded fantastic, I wanted it to be a place we could revisit (without jumping on an international flight). We had a camping trip to Joshua Tree with friends coming up, but I wasn’t sure if I’d get the ring in time. I had it custom made, and took a few months to make. In my head, I thought of places where I could pop the question. I remember seeing a few friends do a un-mapped hike to a place called Heart Rock, which among all the crazy looking Joshua Trees and unusual rock formations, was a rock shaped like a heart. Kinda cheesy, but that’s kinda who we are. Lo and behold, I got the call from the jewelry store the day before our trip that the ring was ready. I picked it up, and called Sonia (Melissa’s mom) to speak to her about me proposing. After a great conversation with her, I picked up Melissa, and we headed to the desert. Initially, I wanted to propose as the sun was setting that day, but SoCal traffic and Daylight savings meant we missed that window. I would have to keep it a secret for one more day. That night, we had a wonderful conversation by the campfire, and I played around with some nighttime photography on a tripod I had brought. I suggested somewhere along the way that we go for a little hike, before the rest of our friends showed up, and she agreed.

The next morning, we start on our little jaunt to the Heart Rock. Melissa loves to put her hand in my jacket pocket, WHICH IS WHERE I HAD THE RING, and I was afraid she would discover it, so I zipped it up, and everytime she tried to insert her hand, she was blocked. I don’t know if she ever noticed, but we kept hiking along…

We got to the rock, after some route finding and a small detour (I got us lost), I set up the tripod, which I “conveniently” brought, and we took some silly pics. I turned to face her, and I don’t remember what I said, but next thing you know, I was down on one knee.

One of the things I love most about Josue is how steady, stable, and consistent he is.

I didn’t need an engagement to feel committed to; Josue weekly demonstrated his commitment not only to me, but to our relationship. Nevertheless, my desire to get engaged came after about a year and a half. Like most of my friends and family, I thought he was going to propose at my graduation party. In retrospect, although I didn’t know it then, I wasn’t ready.

After several ongoing conversations regarding the timing of when our marriage might take place, my A-type personality trusted that Josue’s B-type even-keeled personality would come up with a plan (lol). At that point, I stopped guessing when it would happen and therefore genuinely had no idea when it was coming. I had a fleeting thought he might do it the weekend of his birthday, but that was it...it was fleeting.

On the morning of November 17th, I was very busy taking care of preparations for Josue’s birthday camping trip while Josue “had to work in the morning”. When I dropped off my dog Cici to my mom’s place for the weekend, I noticed a beautiful arrangement of flowers on her dining table and two plates with quesadilla cake crumbs. I called my mom and asked “who gave you flowers?” and she jokingly avoided the question.

We arrived in Joshua tree before the rest of the party came. We prepared some tea and sat by the fire and organically began reflecting about how far we have come as a couple, how thankful we were for one another, and how thankful I was to the Lord for all that he had done in each of our lives to prepare us for each other. When Josue set up the tripod to photograph the moment it seemed appropriate. He asked if we could take some photos early in the morning before everyone arrived and I agreed.

It was early and very cold, so I grabbed the thickest, warmest (and ugliest) clothes I had. Off we went on a beautiful hike with hardly anyone around, enjoying the majestic rock formations as the sun had just come up and was casting a glow. I was so happy.

When we arrived at heart rock I squealed because it was so cute. He set up his tripod to take photos but was in fact taking a video. After a few poses he directed for us to do for the camera, he put both arms around my shoulders and said, “I have something else for you.” He started crying. I started bawling. My mind racing. I don’t remember exactly what he said except, “you are the best thing that has happened to me. The best partner I could have hoped for.” I blanked after that...until I saw that massive rock! Not the heart rock, but that diamond in the little black box with a tiny light shining highlighting all the sparkles. “Put it on me!” I exclaimed...and of course, that’s the only thing you can hear in the video.

It was perfect. We had the privacy to just sit in what just happened, just the two of us, as the sun cast a golden glow on heart rock, on my new beautiful ring, and on the love of my life.

Dating during COVID meant getting creative with our time together. Everything was closed, the normal date activities unavailable. Once we discovered our mutual love for travel and nature in one another, we set off on an incredible adventure. It's one thing to talk about yourself, it's another thing to observe it in action through the difficult and stressful scenarios that arise when traveling and the extended time with one another without a break . Through our adventures we learned priceless lessons about one another and found ourselves in the most incredible backdrops for our love to blossom. Below is an idea of the kind of quality time we were privileged to spend with one another.

We are very much looking forward to our future together as husband and wife and continuing to share our love for adventure with all of you. We can't wait to see what lies ahead