Jacob and Dylan have been best friends since they were 5 years old when they met at their sister’s cheerleading practice. Dylan was the best man at Jacob’s wedding and now Jacob will be his. Our only hope is that the words that come out of his mouth for the speech will sound better than they are spelled on his note cards.

Austin and Dylan met in high school when Austin transferred from Catholic school to public school. Dylan and his other groomsmen berate him with insults on a daily basis, but for some reason he sticks around. So guests at the wedding can feel free to do the same. Answers to Doans. Honestly, calling him Austin will just get you weird looks from those who know him.

Randy and Dylan met in middle school when he was known to most as “Byrdman” (but please don’t call him that, he’ll probably get mad at me). They were roommates for a time, but don’t worry: they managed to remain friends in spite of that. And even though Randy is usually a no show when it comes to playing Xbox with his friends, he’ll probably be in attendance for this weekend.

We have been friends since college and roommates.

We have been friends since 7th grade. I was a bridesmaid at her wedding.

Best known for: looking at trucks, watching Zootopia, pretending any object he’s holding is a laser and going “pew pew”