“What a thoughtful message. He actually read and referenced what I wrote on my dating profile!” That was my first thought when I read Ryan’s first message for me on OkCupid. I had liked his profile prior and was considering sending him a message after I had gone through all the other thoughtless, mass-produced “Hi”, “It’s my birthday” messages. It was a pleasant surprise for me to see a very long and very thoughtful message from a cute guy who seems to share my values.

After a few back and forth, I asked to meet in person. We agreed on ChaTime in Dinkytown (back when it was on SE 4th Street and not 14th Ave SE). It was a December evening in 2017. I opened the door and entered the store as I scanned the room for a face that matched what I saw online. No matches yet. Then, a tall person who entered the store seconds before I did, turned around. We made eye contact and both immediately figured out that we were each other’s date for the evening.

I ordered my usual go-to bubble tea order, while Ryan did the same because he had little bubble tea experience at that point. And he liked it. “That’s a positive,” I thought. We sat at a small table by the wall and chatted. And chatted. Then it was closing time so we had to leave. We abruptly parted that evening, and I thought the date didn’t go too well because there were a few awkward pauses during the evening.

However, Ryan reached out to a schedule a 2nd date few days later. Since it’s winter, I suggested going to the Science Musuem of Minnesota (SMM). To my delight, he agreed. I’ve always wanted to go on a date at SMM since going there on my own. The 2nd date was great! I got to ride in Ryan’s car for the first time; I got to show him my favorite seats in the SMM omnitheater; we got to have fun exploring the exhibits together.

At the end of our fourth date, I initiated our first hug. Ryan said he was going to ask for a hug too, but I was convinced that I would have left the car before he had a chance to ask if I did not already plan on asking. On January 07, 2018, we officially became a couple. Through the next four years, Ryan saw me through the 2nd half of my graduate school (Chemical Physics PhD, for people who don’t know me well), I saw him through a few job changes; we’ve had fun, we’ve had disagreements, and we’ve grown together. We officially got engaged on December 25, 2019, legally tied the knot in a small courthouse ceremony on April 5, 2021, and will soon host a ‘real’ wedding to celebrate with family and friends.

Ryan, thank you for being my goofy partner and for being so supportive. Looking forward to more adventures together!