Our lives have been an absurd story held together by fate, frowned-upon choices, shared trauma, and hearts too big for our own good.

Fate: We found ourselves in treatment at the same time and city, attending the same NA meetings, and sitting in certain seats where she caught my eye. We were both at the beginning of a new journey, growing up and learning how to become our true selves.

Choices: Reaching out to her through Facebook, too scared of fumbling my chance in person, ignoring advice from our support system at that time that said, “work on yourself, don’t date.” Letting our guard down after forcing ourselves to build one so we wouldn’t be hurt

again.

Trauma: Launching ourselves early-on into a life we weren’t raised to live, poisoning our bodies and surrounding ourselves with poor influences. All this time, slowly becoming terrible versions of who we knew we could be, with all of the chaos and confusion and disruption that tagged along with it.

Hearts too Big: Giving our all and then some to people who didn’t deserve it. Hoping for a shred of evidence that they would change into the fictious idealization we concocted in our heads. We were both damaged and hurting from the years of self-abuse we kept putting ourselves through.

When suddenly, our journeys collided…

Not being sure how to go about us getting to know each other in a healthy way, I took her to Culvers for our first date. After close to 6 hours of sitting in a booth, receiving glares from confused employees, and three staggered food/ice cream orders later, the easy conversation made our time fly by faster than I’ve ever experienced. I knew that I had to hold onto what this was even if I had no idea what it was or where it would go. Things progressed faster than we both wanted or expected, and we found ourselves living together, even if it meant me moving into her apartment before she realized what was happening. Looking back now, moving into her little two bedroom upper was a huge life changing decision for both of us and I wouldn’t trade a single day for anything during those 5 years we lived there. We learned so much about each other; good, great and ugly. We both stumbled a lot, learning how to pick one another back up, while trading lessons and trudging through our new adult lives. Within months of living together, I asked her to marry me on the top of a cliff in Devils Lake State Park, knowing I found the woman I wanted to grow old with. Through all this time together, we discovered many common interests and threw ourselves into them; tent camping across our beautiful state, watching and constantly quoting “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia,” attending numerous Wisconsin Timber Rattlers games, and realizing we loved spending as much time together as possible no matter when, what, or where. We’ve been through a lot of ups and downs together in the 7 years we’ve known each other, but the one constant is always wanting to be the best versions of ourselves for the other and doing everything we can to make each other happy. I thank our Lord every day for the overflow of blessings in our lives and cherish every moment we get to grow closer to each other and Him. We are so ready and excited for our next chapter, to finally be husband and wife.