Logan found Colleen rummaging through the trash in Fairmount Park in Philadelphia. She had just found some discarded pizza crust and was scampering to her hidey hole to enjoy her first meal in days when Logan took pity. He wrapped her in a Green Bay Packers jersey but she screamed as the chemical reaction between it and her skin begin to emit smoke. He then found one of the hundreds of discarded Donovan McNabb jerseys littering the park's grounds and swaddled her in it. It was then that they fell in love.

Or if you like the truth: We met in Charleston during the height of Covid in early June, 2020. Colleen had been laid off and clearly had some time on her hands so she took a vacation with her friends. Logan was looking to legally get a haircut and escape his shoebox studio apartment. Nearly five years and many Natty Bohs later, here we are.