Book Your Wedding with Bourne Mansion


About Us

Gaze at the wonder and elegance of the Bourne Mansion as you wind your way up its long drive. Located in Oakdale, New York. This 205-acre property is a couple's dream come true wedding venue and sits just 90 minutes from New York City. It first became a desired ceremony and reception location when Vanderbilt's daughter got married here back in 1895.

This private estate and historical landmark provides the bride and groom with countless first-look photograph spots throughout. Couples have the choice of the following ceremony and event spaces.

The Lawn. The lawn offers stunning views of the Great South Bay and the surrounding landscape. This meticulously manicured area can host huge receptions of up to 1,000 guests.

Courtyard Patio. Magnificent columns define the courtyard patio space, which is an excellent venue for hosting a cocktail hour. Guests can mingle while the bride, groom and wedding party spend some time having pictures taken.

The Grand Ballroom. Used for both indoor ceremonies and receptions, the Grand Ballroom wows with its 40-foot vaulted ceilings and glass domes. The room accommodates up to 300 guests and has plenty of room for dancing. A gorgeous balcony and romantic lighting really set the mood for your special day.


What You Should Know

The Bourne Mansion provides a level of service and support far beyond many other wedding venues. Each couple is given a wedding coordinator to work with vendors and keep them on track with important due dates, as well as a maître d' and attendant. Although to-be-weds are required to use the in-house caterer and bartending services, they are free to browse the extensive preferred vendors list for everything from florists to photographers to disc jockeys. All wedding packages include white or ivory linens, decorative votive candles that can be used as centerpieces and place cards for each guest.

Your guests are sure to be impressed when they arrive and find white-gloved butler-passed hors d'oeuvres, champagne and a delicious plate of strawberries. The mansion's culinary team offers tasty hors d'eouvres, such as nocellini wrapped in salami, mini Chesapeake crab cakes and sesame chicken sate with peanut dipping sauce. Guests can then dine on an appetizer and up to four stations, such as a pasta, steakhouse or Asian station. A sushi table and jumbo shrimp bar are available for an added fee. Finally, the bride and groom will receive a custom-designed 4-tier wedding cake with a choice of filling surrounded by plates of European cookies and pastries.


Extra Perks

The bride and her bridesmaids will find the bridal changing room a welcoming extra perk. There is plenty of space to have hair and make-up done so that the ladies can get ready right on site. A few more benefits associated with the Bourne Mansion are listed below.

  • Valet parking
  • Coat check
  • AV equipment rentals
  • Handicap accessible
  • Wireless Internet service

From the Vendor

Luxury - Award Winning - Perfect

60 minutes from New York City, the Bourne Mansion is the perfect location for the wedding of your dreams. With panoramic views, manicured gardens & extraordinary cuisine & service, your special day will be remembered for a lifetime.

Amenities + Details

  • Handicap Accessible

  • Indoor

  • Reception Area

For more details about amenities, please message the Venue.

Price Range

$$$ – Moderate

Venue Capacity



Ballroom, Waterfront, Historic Venue, Mansion + Estate

Wedding Categories

Food + Catering, Planning, Rentals + Equipment, Service Staff

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Contact Info

500 Montauk Highway, Oakdale, NY (631) 581-0022

Reviewed on 3/12/2018 Shawnisa F

My husband and I are Muslim, and we needed to find the ideal place to accommodate our needs as well as the needs of our guess... 3 weeks later we’re getting great comments about the event. From the beginning til the end , perrrfect ! Miriam was personal and professional , above... Read More and beyond , I love her! Jake was amazzzing , it was a match made in heaven (my maitre D and I) . If I can give 10 stars I would !

Reviewed on 2/27/2018 BobbieAnn B

I had my wedding at the Bourne this past Saturday and I can't say enough of wonderful things. Working with Miriam leading up to the wedding was such a great experience. She made the vision I had for my ice sculpture come to life and even surprise me with how amazing it was in... Read More person! She answered any question I had quickly and was full of knowledge. The day of my wedding working with Steve and his team was a great experience as well. They went above and beyond to make sure everything was perfect for not only myself but my bridal party and family. The food was also delicious! I highly recommend booking your event at the Bourne Mansion!

Reviewed on 1/17/2018 Jessica P

We had our wedding reception at the Bourne in December, and it was absolutely perfect! Miriam was so helpful during the entire planning process, from answering emails right away to scheduling appointments at the venue for us to gather some more information. Steve worked our... Read More wedding night and he made sure everything went off without a hitch. He kept everything moving like clockwork, and always checked in with us to see if we had everything we needed/wanted. I would highly recommend this venue to any one, they really do such a spectacular job while making sure it's exactly what you and your fiance were envisioning. My husband and I are still wishing he could relive that night again- hopefully we get to go to someone else's wedding there!

Reviewed on 1/16/2018 Kendal C

My wedding at Bourne was hands down the best night of my life. From the ambiance of the Mansion to the delicious food to the most amazing maitre d and bridal attendant my husband and I could not have asked for a better night. There is nothing we would do over and it is all... Read More thanks to Miriam, Katherine, Steve and the rest of the Bourne family. We have had so many people tell us it was the best wedding they have ever been to and we cannot be more elated with how everything went. Steve really makes sure that everything down to the minute is on schedule and running smoothly. Every time my new husband and I left our dais our water and champagne were magically refilled. We had so much fun and could not have asked for a better night. I really could not have dreamt of a better wedding. It was absolutely perfect in every way.

Reviewed on 12/27/2017 Marie A

Bourne Mansion is a gorgeous venue for a wedding (or any event) - we are so happy that we were able to have ours there this past June (2017) First of all, Miriam was our venue contact, she is the Director of Mansion Sales, and she was AMAZING. She was always available to talk... Read More through any detail, was very kind and just the right person you want to guide you through the planning process. She was great at easing any worries and worked within our budget. Secondly, Bourne is a Lessings location so the food was impeccable and delicious - all our guests had only the best things to say about the everything! Not to mention, the bridal suite and new grooms suite were spacious and came out gorgeous in the pictures. The grounds are incredible, the staff was super helpful and thoughtful throughout the day and everything went out without a hitch. We would recommend this to anyone who wants to feel some old-school glamour along the gorgeous backdrop of the south shore of Long Island.

Reviewed on 12/19/2017 Ryan H

Right after we got engaged, my wife and I were scheduled to visit about ten different wedding venues on Long Island. The first place we visited was the Bourne Mansion, and that ultimately became the last place we visited. The mansion itself is magnificent and the feeling you get... Read More when you are walking around inside is something that you’ll never experience again at another wedding venue. Each room has a unique feel to it and the ballroom itself is breathtaking. Miriam was the main contact person we dealt with from the moment we booked the venue up until the day of our wedding. Anyone that has had the pleasure to meet and work with her knows that, besides being very good at her job, she is an amazing woman who will go above and beyond what is expected of her to make sure your wedding is as perfect and unforgettable as possible. Whenever we had a question about anything, Miriam was always promptly accessible via phone or email. As for the actual wedding day, we specifically requested to have Steve as our maître d’ based primarily on previous reviews. He certainly did not disappoint. When we met with him roughly 48 hours before our wedding to go over the schedule for the day, it was clear Steve knew what he is doing. He is exceptionally organized and very meticulous with regards to planning the entire wedding day, especially after you arrive at the mansion. He will give you a minute-by-minute breakdown relating to the key events of the day, which is something we greatly appreciated. This alleviated a lot of stress because everyone in the wedding knew exactly when and where they needed to be after arriving at the venue. On the actual day of the wedding, Steve executed the schedule he laid out perfectly. And when the band we hired to play at our reception showed up late due to weather-related issues, Steve played a vital role of getting everything back on track and running smoothly. On top of all that, he was tremendous in making sure we always had a drink in our hand and plenty of food either in the bridal suite or on our table in the ballroom. The last thing I said to Steve before leaving the mansion was that he was one of the highlights of my wedding day and I truly meant that. So, in summation, the Bourne Mansion has everything. The building itself is exquisite and classy, the staff is second to none, and the food both during the cocktail hour and the reception was delicious. My family from Pennsylvania labeled our wedding as the “royal wedding” because of the beauty and elegance associated with the mansion, and I could not agree more. If we could do it all over again, there is nowhere else my wife and I would choose to celebrate our marriage other than the Bourne Mansion.

Reviewed on 12/15/2017 Jamie M

My mom dragged me to see Bourne Mansion, in a snowstorm and I fell in love. If you don't think this place is "you" I truly urge you to go visit! From the moment I walked into the Bourne Mansion I was enchanted. Miriam helped us nearly every step of the way from day one. She... Read More could not have been more sweet and accommodating; always giving great tips and letting you know where you could cut corners and where to invest. Jake was our maitre'd the day of the wedding and I could not compliment him enough for the amazing work he did to constantly stay two steps ahead of the game and keep me informed of where I needed to be promptly when I needed to be there so I could enjoy the most of my time at my big event. If you have big families he is skilled at corralling large groups. My guests were definitely wowed with the property itself; the library has velvet textured walls and the music room sweeps you away into another world. What impressed our guests even more so was the delicious variety of food served during the cocktail hour; home runs included the goat cheese and pesto tarte, the pulled pork, the pastrami and the fact that there was something for everyone. We highly recommend the venetian hour and to go coffee bar. You won't need much extra decor in this place...seriously! We did minimal flowers and very low-key decor on the mantels and bar tops. I can honestly say I had the perfect wedding day and it couldn't have been complete without the Bourne Mansion and it's wonderful, impeccable staff!

Reviewed on 12/05/2017 Deanna Z

Where to begin.. My husband and I had the most magical wedding. Something we dreamed of for over a year quickly came to reality. The Bourne is not only breathtaking but the staff was OUTSTANDING. Steve, Miriam, and Natalie made our day go off without error. Anything we asked or... Read More wanted was presented to us in a snap of a finger. They were beyond attentive to detail and took such good care of us as the bride and groom and our guests. The food and drinks were beyond delicious and the entire night was perfection. I can't stay enough about the staff at the Bourne I highly highly recommend this venue.

Reviewed on 11/25/2017 Allison T

My husband Matt and I had our wedding reception at The Bourne Mansion about one month ago. It was one of the most magical days of our lives. From the start of the planning process Miriam was very helpful and passionate about her job. The day of the wedding was outstanding.... Read More The food was wonderful and the people helping us on the day of the wedding were kind and professional. Jake was with us every step of the way at the reception. You can definitely tell that everyone at The Bourne Mansion really knows what they are doing and they do this often. Each detail was perfect and my husband and I will treasure this day forever. We highly recommend The Bourne Mansion. We had about 150 guests and the ballroom was very comfortable for this size party.

Reviewed on 11/14/2017 Elizabeth P

Look no further--Bourne is THE BEST wedding venue there is! Miriam guided us and helped make every detail special leading up to the day while Steve's spot-on organization and direction made the day run FLAWLESSLY. The team at Bourne is top-notch, as well as the gorgeous space,... Read More delicious food & drinks, and highest caliber of customer service from beginning to end. THANK YOU Miriam, Steve, Katherine, and everyone at Bourne who made our wedding the best day ever!!! Lots of love--Lizzie & Cian

Reviewed on 10/30/2017 Tracey B

Where do I begin? My Daughter had her Wedding Reception at The Bourne last week, a one of a kind ~ fairytale making venue. The elegance, yet understated beauty is unlike any other wedding venue I have seen. The Bourne exceeded any “vision” my daughter & I had, and the food ….... Read More one word I heard that night and every day since, Fabulous; the Filet Mignon, Lamb, Oso Busco, Hanger Steak, Clams, Oyster, Shrimp Station ......... Miriam Aronson, The Bourne’s Event Director was a treasure; she not only guided us all along the way with ideas, but she answered all concerns & questions right away. She knew where & what we could save on for all the little details we wanted. Steve Melita was our Maitre’d & I can't imagine anyone doing it better. He runs a tight ship and is on top of everything, down to the smallest detail. He noticed when we didn’t have a drink in our hand and would personally get us one or made sure we knew to be in a particular location, so we wouldn’t miss a particular moment. He even came to tell me that my dinner was on the table and not to let it get cold! The attentiveness was 2nd to none. Aside from Steve, Miriam & ALL the Bourne Staff, the other person who made our day so enjoyable and relaxing was Janet Godfrey, an Event Coordinator from Deborah Minarik Events, who I met at the Bourne's Showcase & hired to be our Day of Event Coordinator. WHO KNEW THERE WAS SUCH A THING!!! I have spent the last week telling everyone that there is no way they should have a big event without Janet. Along with Steve, Janet was the one who allowed my husband, daughter, new son-in-law & I to actually live in the moment of the day. She took care of all the “business” of the day; & let’s be real, a wedding is a day for Fairytale Dreams, but it’s also business deals with different vendors; having Janet allowed us to stay in the Fairytale that is the Bourne Mansion, so between Steve & Janet ….. Everything was taken care of. To know that they were there, worrying about even the small details .... Priceless. I was told by my family that I have placed The Bar Very High and they are not happy! LOL So it appears as though I may be attending quite a few more weddings at The Bourne in the future!!!!

Reviewed on 10/27/2017 Nicole P

We could not have asked for more on our wedding day. We fell in love with Bourne on our first visit and the staff never disappointed. Steve Melita is absolutely amazing and the ultimate profession. The staff is passionate, friendly and warm and made sure our wedding was a... Read More beautiful success.

Reviewed on 10/17/2017 Maria C

If you ever imagined how a wedding should be Steve & Miriam will do it 30x better. I had my wedding at the Bourne Mansion on 10/7/17 and it was one of the most beautiful evenings I could of ever asked for. During the planning process the best thing about working with Miriam is... Read More that she genuinely loves to help her brides get the most out of their day. There was nothing that she couldn't help me with! And Steve, our Maitre'd, was nothing short of incredible the day of our wedding. Steve was always 3 steps ahead of everyone else. He would hand me a tissue and I haven't even sneezed yet (lol!). Which made it so easy to not have to think of anything that was going on except to just enjoy the party! I personally the venue simply speaks for itself. It was one of the most incredible places with the most beautiful grounds that I have ever seen. The food was impeccable!!! And the rest of the lessings staff were true delights to have at my wedding! Thank you all for everything!!!!

Reviewed on 9/29/2017 Devon W

My husband and I were married at the Bourne Mansion on 8/25. It was truly and amazing experience! We can not say enough good things about our wedding reception. Steve was our Maitre d' and Feggy was my bridal attendant. They were both awesome! The service we received as bride... Read More and groom was top notch and our guests partied the night away! The food was great and the atmosphere was magical. We can not say enough good things about the Lessing's team.

Reviewed on 9/08/2017 Ida C

We got married at the Bourne Mansion on July 29, 2017 and I must say that the whole experience was straight out of a fairytale! From the time we met the staff, especially Steve and Miriam, we hit it off! Miriam knew just what we needed to please our guests and had great... Read More suggestions for how to make it all look and feel fabulous. By the time our wedding day came, the Bourne Mansion staff felt like our family! The wedding day went off without a hitch, Steve wouldn't have it any other way! The staff was attentive and the food was raved about by all of my guests. The Bourne Mansion is a beautiful and charismatic venue and the people who run it are too!

Reviewed on 7/29/2017 Rachel B

We got married at the Bourne Mansion back in June, and our special day was more than we could have asked for! My husband and I didn't want to get married in your typical catering hall, so the Bourne Mansion was a great choice since it is an incredibly beautiful and unique... Read More mansion, but with all the amenities of a catering hall. Miriam was a pleasure to work with from the start, and Steve was great to deal with leading up to the day of our wedding. They are incredibly professional and made sure as much as possible was done beforehand to make our day go off without a hitch. Jake was our maitre-d' and he was fantastic. He was on top of everything the day of, made sure everything went smoothly, and most importantly, made sure myself and my husband had stuff to eat and drink. The bridal attendant was great, as well as the entire rest of the staff. All of our guests raved about what an amazing time they had, and how great the quality of service they received from the staff was. We couldn't have imagined a more perfect day.

Reviewed on 7/22/2017 Jacqueline P

We had our wedding at the Bourne Mansion on May 20, 2017 and it was above and beyond our expectations. Without a doubt, we would choose this venue again in a heart beat. Looking back now, one of the things we loved most was that there was a true emphasis on making sure we... Read More appreciated and enjoyed OUR day. Steve, the maitre d', was incredible. It is clear that the moment you work with him that he is very experienced and very good at what he does. Without him and his team, there are definitely things we would not have appreciated about our day. For example, he always made sure we were eating and had a drink in our hands. This was important to us as all of our friends insisted that we would not eat or drink at our wedding. Definitely not the case here, we ENJOYED our day. He kept everything organized and minimized all of the little things that can cause stress or distractions. Finally he made sure that after everyone left, we spent some time enjoying our cake as a couple, by ourselves. For that, we truly appreciated him. Aside from everything I mentioned, the food was OUTSTANDING. Two months later, our guests are still talking about our food. The cocktail hour, the dinner, the desserts were all incredible. Our guests also very much enjoyed the pretzels at the end. Unfortunately, we don't recall the woman's name who was handing out the pretzels but our guests LOVED her. To the Bourne staff reading this, please thank her for us! The venue itself was beautiful but I don't think you need this review to see that. It was in excellent condition on our day. Our photos managed to capture the beauty of the Bourne which definitely will leave us with a lifetime of happy memories. Finally, we can't help but mention Miriam who you will meet when you tour the Bourne Mansion and will work with her closely when you book your event. She always made herself available, was always pleasant to work with, and offered so many excellent suggestions; from decorating to the food choices. We cannot thank her enough for all of her help. Overall, our Bourne Mansion wedding was outstanding. We are very blessed to be able to have our wedding here as we know it somewhat more expensive but we feel it was worth every penny. We had a beautiful wedding that we will remember forever. Thank you to everyone who helped make it happen!

Reviewed on 7/13/2017 Peter C

I am one of the most AnAl people you will ever find. The Bourne Mansion was everything I could possibly have wished for on my special day. It may not have the celebrity hype like other venues but that is because it is classy and elegant and understated. Exactly what my husband... Read More and I were looking for. From our first day pulling up to the Bourne which takes your breath away to meeting with the incomparable Miriam I thought I was in a dream. Miriam made us feel at ease and confident and most importantly she truly cares about your wedding. Then after many meetings with Miriam she passes you along to Steve Melita. At first Steve comes off brash but one will soon realize that is because he is an absolute artist and master at what he does. Steve is rough around the edges but one lovable teddy bear inside. If you want your wedding to go off without a hitch then you will be smart enough to trust Steve. The best way I can describe Miriam and Steve is Miriam is the composer and Steve the conductor and with the two of them working together a master piece is composed. If you are smart enough you will see exactly what I am talking about as you plan your dream day at the Bourne Mansion. You can't go wrong.

Reviewed on 7/13/2017 Denise A

This venue was truly magnificent!! My husband and I had the most perfect day ever, and the whole team at Bourne mansion worked hard to make all of our dreams a reality! Miriam and Steve are both amazing at what they do, and we couldn't be more grateful for all their insights..... Read More Now we are just waiting to be invited as a guest to an affair here so we can really enjoy! Lol

Reviewed on 6/07/2017 Lina A

From start to finish and every step in between, Miriam, Steve & entire the Lessings crew at Bourne Mansion were absolutely phenomenal! Their years of experience and perfect combination of professionalism & personal attention really set them apart from every other vendor i met... Read More with...this is all on top of being at one of the most physically beautiful and unique venues in the Northeast...AND offering Lessings delicious catering services. This crew was was not only attentive, and super quick to respond/cater to our every need leading up to and during the wedding, but they were fun, trustworthy, and accommodating to almost every request or concern we had. Miriam genuinely loves her job and you can tell- she was honestly like a second mom to us throughout the whole planning process. She made our dreams come true, was beyond helpful in planning every little detail, and we really cant thank her enough. Our guests were absolutely amazed at how gorgeous the venue was and how delicious ALL the food was! Katherine the bridal attendant was also a Godsend on the day of, and the whole catering staff was so hard working. It was like she magically appeared any and every time we needed her without even asking. Between Steve and Katherine, every little detail was covered and taken care of on the day of the wedding. Steve definitely runs a TIGHT SHIP, and ensures everything gets done. All in all, if you get married here, trust and rest assured - you are in GREAT HANDS!

Reviewed on 4/03/2017 Megan A

We just had our wedding here. I can't say enough about the venue, food and staff. It was the perfect day. Thank you Steve and Miriam!

Reviewed on 3/28/2017 Ally F

The Bourne Mansion was actually the first venue we looked at when planning our wedding and we fell in love with it instantly. We looked at a bunch of other places afterwards just to make sure we didn't love it just because it was the first place we saw and nothing else even came... Read More close to comparing. We ended up having both our ceremony and our reception there on 3-25-17. The venue itself is stunning - with a gorgeous outdoor area, several rooms in which cocktail hour is held allowing guests to explore, and then of course the giant, beautiful ballroom which very easily held our 200 guests without feeling crowded. (I am very picky and hate ballrooms with carpets so I also instantly loved the fact that the entire room has hardwood floors.) Not only is the space gorgeous, and each room unique, but the food is amazing as well. All of our guests raved about the tons of delicious food during cocktail hour (my personal favorite was definitely the raw bar), the dinner, and of course the midnight pizza/burger/french fry/tomato soup station and cherry jubilee/banana foster station we offered for dessert. Working with Miriam leading up to the event, and Steve the night of, was an absolute pleasure. They are both extremely professional, know exactly what they are doing, respond to all of my sometimes crazy questions/requests and really help to create an extremely personal event that caters exactly to the tastes of the bride and groom. As someone who is an incredibly picky perfectionist, I find it amazing that I really couldn't find any flaws with the entire experience. Our night was just so incredibly perfect and our guests have not stopped complimenting us on our choice of venue. I cannot recommend this highly enough!

Reviewed on 3/09/2017 Katie K

Where do I start? This place makes dreams come true. We had our wedding at the Mansion this past weekend and everyone said it was the most beautiful and decadent venue they've every been to. Steve was our Maître D' and Miriam was our wedding director. I cannot even begin to tell... Read More you how they made planning and executing every last detail so easy. The night was like a fairytale. Thank you to the Bourne Mansion for making our special day even better than we ever imagined.

Reviewed on 12/23/2016 Colleen H

If you haven't seen Bourne Mansion in person you need to go there now!! It captivated me from the moment we walked through the door. It creates a coziness for your guests at cocktail hour and then grandness as you enter the ballroom. I was slightly concerned about the price our... Read More wedding would be but it is absolutely true you get what you pay for. Steve, the maitre'd and Miriam took care of us in the most amazing ways. Miriam answered all questions about weddings even if not relevant to Bourne specific details. Steve provided us with a timeline for our event, was reassuring in my times of nervousness, and made sure we and all of our guests were well taken care of. At the end of the night the entire dance floor was chanting his name as he encouraged our DJ to keep the party going a few extra minutes. I could never thank him, Miriam, Nicolette, and all the staff at Bourne for making my wedding the most wonderful day. This is by far the best kept secret wedding venue on Long Island!!!!

Reviewed on 12/06/2016 Maria s

Elegant, beautiful and incredible! Best decision we made was to choose Bourne Mansion as our venue. From booking the date, to the actual wedding day - the process was seamless due to the amazing staff on hand. Miriam was constantly at my beck and call whenever I had 100 wedding... Read More questions for her. She always was polite and very helpful!!! (THANK YOU!) The day of our wedding, we had Steve as our maitre'd. He kept everything organized and ran a tight ship. Him and his staff made sure we were eating, drinking and were happy. ( You are the best, Steve!) They go above and beyond- not to mention, the food is impeccable. The mansion was perfect for our winter wedding!