Wedding Vows Templates & 20 Questions to Help Write Vows

Kick the writer's block and jumpstart your creativity with these meaningful questions.
The Knot
Updated Jul 17, 2020

Can we guess? You thought writing your own wedding vows would take a breezy half hour, but now you're dealing with a case of writer's block and worried about embarrassing yourself. Don't beat yourself up. You're not the first person to struggle with transforming life-altering emotions into succinct, coherent words. Writing wedding vows that feel worthy of your amazing partner and the love you have for them is hard –– even with the help of a vow template. Start from the beginning and take it one word at a time. Get inspired by this list of questions and wedding vow templates about your relationship and what makes it so special. Once you get a little rhythm going, you'll have a string of deep, funny and personalized vows finished in no time, promise.

1. What did you think about when you first met?

When it comes to love stories, perhaps there's no better place to start than at the very beginning. Describing how you first met, along with what went through your head at that moment, is a tale that you're sure to share in many forms for years to come –– but for now, your friends and family (and partner!) will love hearing about it as part of your special day.

Wedding vow template: When we met at __________, I thought/knew __________.

2. When did you realize that you were in love with them?

Was it when they brought your grandmother flowers on her birthday, surprised you with a home-cooked dinner after a tough day at work or watched your favorite movie with you for the hundredth time? When you realized this was the big L-O-V-E, did you feel like you were struck with a lightning bolt, or more like you were being covered with a warm blanket? The more detail you can provide, the more touching and meaningful the story.

Wedding vow template: I knew I was in love when ____________.

3. How have they changed you for the better?

When it comes to marriage, most individuals choose a partner who somehow improves their inner self. Has yours taught you to be kinder or more considerate, helped you develop a new skill or talent, or inspired you to speak out more for yourself or on behalf of others?

Wedding vow template: Before I met you, I ___________. Now I ___________.

4. How has your view of the world changed since meeting them?

Finding the right person can expand the ways how you see everything and everyone around you. Since you've met and fallen in love, think about what experiences have you shared together that changed your world viewpoint.

Wedding vow template: Because of you, I see the world __________.

5. What part of them do you crave when you are apart?

There's often something simple about our loved one that we miss when they are not around. For you, this may be a smile, a gentle touch, or an act of kindness like when your partner brings you a cup of coffee every morning.

Wedding vow template: When we are apart, I miss __________.

6. Where do you see yourselves in 10 years, 20 years and 40 years?

Go beyond, "Happily married in a big house." What are your long-term hopes dreams and goals? And remember, it could be as simple as enjoying the sunset on a pair of Adirondack chairs, or as big as being there for each other when times get tough.

Wedding vow template: I can't wait to __________, laughing and __________ as we __________.

7. Is there a line from a movie, song or poem that says it all?

It's definitely okay to borrow, as long as it's not too much of a cliche. Instead, modify something familiar to personalize.

Wedding vow template: Whenever I see you ________, I think, "God only knows what I'd be without you."

8. Do parts of the traditional vows resonate with you?

Maybe you're not about that whole "obey" part, but can you really go wrong with love, cherish and __________?

Wedding vow template: I promise to cherish and honor you ____________, (but add a time frame and funny reference for levity) all the days of my life, especially when curled up on the couch with takeout.

9. Can you think of a funny or touching experience that put your partner in a new light?

Maybe the way they played with your little cousin or helped your grandmother up the stairs showed you an entirely new side to them that made them even more wonderful in your eyes.

Wedding vow template: When you ____________, I saw you for the _____________ person you are.

10. What goals and values do you both have?

Stating your common bond may just expose your inner Wordsworth. These ties—whether your shared faith or your mutual love of wine—will also help demonstrate why you're a perfect pair.

Wedding vow template: We share ___________, so together we can ___________.

11. What about your partner inspires you?

Is there something about your partner you'd like to improve in yourself? What do you most respect about your partner?

Wedding vow template: Your ability/willingness to ___________ has shown me how to be___________.

12. What promise can you make to solidify and encapsulate your devotion?

Here's your opportunity to personalize your vows. So many couples pledge their endless love, but how many promise to take the dog out in the morning, even in the snow, or to stop Netflix cheating when their partner gets up to grab a glass of water.

Wedding vow template: I promise to always ___________.

13. How will you change together?

You know what your goals are—think about the steps the two of you will need to take together to reach them as team.

Wedding vow template: I look forward to ___________ as we __________.

14. What metaphor (or simile) would capture your love?

You might laugh because this can feel a little corny to think about, but brainstorm things that describe or define your love.

Wedding vow template: Our love is like a ___________ because it ___________.

15. Why are you entering the bond of marriage?

Think about why marrying your partner is so particularly special. You may be surprised how the answer to this question leads you to the perfect words.

Wedding vow template: To me, marriage is ___________. With you, it's ___________.

16. What will keep your marriage strong?

Dig deep and find the bedrock of your relationship.

Wedding vow template: I know that even when life gets hard, you and I will __________, because __________.

17. What makes your relationship tick?

Is it your resilience, your shared sense of humor or the same passion for life? What binds you and makes you compatible enough to work together forever?

Wedding vow template: Even when ___________, we will always have ___________.

18. What do you expect out of married life?

Defining your expectations will help you make and keep promises. Think about your dreams, and what you'll have to vow to do to make them come true.

Wedding vow template: I know our marriage will ___________ and I vow to ___________.

19. What words do you associate with love?

Make a list of romantic terms so you can avoid overusing "love"—too many repetitions dilute its power.

Wedding vow template: My devotion/adoration/passion for you is ___________.

20. What are you most looking forward to about married life?

The wedding is just the beginning of this insanely amazing journey. Maybe you can't wait to raise a family with your partner. Or maybe you're psyched to have a built-in plus-one (that you're totally in love with) for the rest of your life. Be funny, be sentimental—say whatever feels right.

Wedding vow template: I look forward to ___________ as we embark on ___________.

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