How to Write a Great Speech for Your Daughter's Bridal Shower

Keep it short, sweet and authentic.
Lauren Dana Ellman - The Knot Contributor.
by
Lauren Dana
Lauren Dana Ellman - The Knot Contributor.
Lauren Dana
The Knot Contributor
  • Lauren is a contributor for The Knot covering topics such as music, cakes, venues and speeches.
  • She has been published in a wide array of lifetsyle-oriented publications including SELF and Allure.
  • Lauren is a proud graduate of Syracuse University's SI Newhouse School of Public Communication.
Updated Sep 23, 2021

As the mother of the bride, you've likely been tasked with giving a speech not only at your daughter's wedding, but also at her bridal shower. This is a great opportunity to truly highlight your daughter and speak about the relationship you two share.

As you gear up for your daughter's bridal shower—and subsequently begin prepping your speech—Kevin Dennis, who owns Fantasy Sound Event Services in Livermore, California, recommends soaking in the moment. "The opportunity to give a speech at your daughter's bridal shower is fleeting, so you'll want to remember it fondly," he says.

A bridal shower speech from the mother of the bride can be given at any time that seems appropriate, says Hester Parks, who owns Park Avenue Events in Atlanta. For more formal events, it's normally given at the start of the meal, whereas at more casual events, it'll likely be given when the cake is being cut or while gifts are being opened. Read on for more expert advice to help you give a fabulous bridal shower speech as the mother of the bride.

How Long Should a Bridal Shower Speech From the Mother of the Bride Be?

You'll want to keep your bridal shower speech short and sweet. There isn't a magic number—some experts recommend anywhere from five to seven minutes, while others advise sticking to two or three minutes maximum.

"Guests can get antsy very quickly, especially when there's food and alcohol involved," Dennis says. "If your toast goes on too long, you're more likely to be remembered for the length of the speech rather than the content."

How to Write a Bridal Shower Speech From the Mother of the Bride

The first step in writing a speech for your daughter's bridal shower is to sit down and gather your thoughts. Give yourself ample time to brainstorm, and don't procrastinate.

Next, it's time to start outlining. "Make a list of the things you would like to include or say about your daughter and the sentiment you would like to convey," says Tara Fay, a wedding and event planner based in Dublin.

According to Los Angeles-based wedding and event planner David Tutera, the key to a successful speech is authenticity. "When writing the speech, the mother of the bride should write from the heart and share how proud she is of her daughter and where she is now," he says. "A few sweet stories about her daughter as a child and now as a woman about to walk down the aisle are always great, heartwarming anecdotes to include."

A Bridal Shower Speech From the Mother of the Bride Template

If you're unsure where to start and feel like you need some speech ideas for inspiration, check out this handy step-by-step guide from Katelyn Peterson of Wedding Words, a wedding vows and speech-writing service. (The best part? These tips can also be repurposed for your wedding toast.)

1. Welcome your guests. Start off by introducing yourself to the crowd. (Most people will know who you are, this is just a formality to open up the speech.)

2. Give thanks. This is where you'll want to thank everyone for attending. Here, you'll also want to highlight the wedding party.

3. Talk about the bride-to-be. Share stories that highlight admirable qualities and traits about the future bride.

4. Discuss your mother-daughter relationship. Once you're done "bragging" about your daughter, tell some stories that illustrate your special bond.

5. Cap it off with a toast. Invite your guests to join you in raising a glass to the beloved bride-to-be, wishing her a lifetime of happiness ahead. Feel free to mention how thrilled you are that your daughter has found true love and how excited you are for the big day.

Who Does the Mother of the Bride Thank in Her Bridal Shower Speech?

As the mother of the bride, you should always thank everyone for coming to attend your daughter's bridal shower.

According to Parks, you'll also want to acknowledge anyone who came from afar or who had to make a special effort to be there, such as elderly relatives.

Fay also suggests thanking your daughter for providing you with so much joy throughout your life. "If grandmothers, aunts and godmothers are present, they should also be acknowledged, as with any other mother figures in the bride's life," Fay says.

New York City-based event planner JoAnn Gregoli recommends giving your daughter's future mother-in-law a special shout-out in your speech, too.

And don't forget about the wedding party: Make sure you thank your daughter's friends for their support and friendship, especially throughout the wedding planning process. "There's no need to list every attendant by name if there are more than four attendants," Peterson says. "In that case, a general thank you to the wedding party will cover it."

How to Give a Bridal Shower Speech From the Mother of the Bride

If public speaking isn't your thing, don't fret. Instead of memorizing your speech, create a printable version that you can easily read from come the day of the bridal shower. "You don't need the added pressure, and no one expects you to have it memorized," Peterson says. As you're presenting the speech, try to look up every few seconds to maintain eye contact with your guests and daughter.

"This is your opportunity to share with your daughter, family and your daughter's guests how much her happiness with her partner means to you," Dennis says. That being said, try not to overthink things in an attempt to find the "right words." Instead, just focus on delivering a genuine speech that displays your love and support for your daughter as she embarks on this exciting new chapter with her partner. Also, it's OK if you shed a tear or two—expressing emotion is totally normal.

Bridal Shower Speech From the Mother of the Bride Jokes

A mother is probably the only person who can share a joke about the bride, Fay says.

If you can't think of an appropriate joke, it's best not to tell one. "It never hurts to share a funny anecdote about the bride, but if you don't have a good joke, don't force it," says Laura Maddox of Magnolia Celebrates in Atlanta.

If you do opt to include jokes in your speech, make sure that they are lighthearted and tasteful. For example, Fay recommends sharing an anecdote or something funny the bride did as a child and explaining why that has contributed to her becoming the person she is today.

Need some more inspiration? Peterson's got you covered: "Is there a cute story you can retell from when your daughter dressed up as a bride for Halloween? Or, can you recount the time your mother-daughter Disney trip didn't go as planned?" The key, she says, is to pick a short, funny anecdote that shows an admirable quality about the bride while also entertaining guests.

Bridal Shower Speech From the Mother of the Bride Example

Looking for a dose of inspiration? Check out this fully written mother of the bride toast.

Hi everyone! First off, I wanted to thank you all so much for coming out to celebrate Rachel's bridal shower. It means so much to us that you were able to take the time out of your busy schedules to celebrate our beautiful bride-to-be.

As Rachel's mother, I've been dreaming about her wedding day—and all of the fun leading up to it—for years. And so has Rachel. Ever since she was a little girl, Rachel has always looked forward to planning her dream wedding. Perhaps it was all those Disney movies we showed her, but Rachel is one of those people who had their wedding planned out in elementary school.

Fast-forward to today, and Rachel has found her one true love in Parker. From the first time I saw them together, I realized how perfectly their personalities complemented one another. I truly love Parker like my own child. To be able to watch my daughter live out her fairy-tale-worthy love story has been an incredible gift, and I can't wait for the rest of it to unfold.

It takes a village of strong women to raise a child, and I am grateful for my own small-but-mighty crew featuring my mother, my sister and my sister-in-law. I'd also be remiss not to mention how special Parker's mother Jen is. Thank you for welcoming my daughter with such open arms.

I know I'm not a perfect mother by any means, but I must have done something right to have raised such a sweet, kind and caring daughter. As she has grown older, Rachel has become my best friend. I'm so grateful for our special relationship.

On that note, I am fortunate that my daughter has dozens of supportive friends—including her six wonderful bridesmaids and bridesmen. They have all shown her loyalty and compassion throughout the exciting (and sometimes stressful) wedding planning process. I extend my thanks to you all and am so happy you are forever a part of our family.

Now, Rachel, I don't mean to get all "mom" on you, but the best wedding gift I could give you goes beyond home decor, silverware or bedding. Instead, I'll leave you with a few pieces of marriage advice, which are to appreciate every moment, not sweat the small stuff, and always be open and honest when it comes to communication.

Rachel, I can't wait to see you in your wedding dress on your big day. I would love for you all to join me in raising a glass to the happy couple as they embark on this exciting journey ahead.

How to End the Bridal Shower Speech From the Mother of the Bride

Don't forget to end your bridal shower speech with some well-wishes for your daughter as she prepares for her special day.

An easy way to do this is to invite your guests to raise a glass and toast to your daughter's happiness. Gregoli recommends saying something along the lines of: "Please join me as we toast our bride-to-be on the journey that lies ahead."

What NOT to Say in a Bridal Shower Speech From the Mother of the Bride

To avoid potential mishaps—or the possibility of embarrassing your daughter—there are some topics you'll want to avoid in your bridal shower speech. The following are off-limits:

"Don't get too weepy, especially if the father of the bride or another loved one has passed away or isn't present," Fay says. The day is already emotional. She suggests simply saying that the deceased family member would've loved to have been there.

"Don't expose any of the bride's secrets," Parks says. "It won't end well."

Tutera recommends avoiding speaking about exes, telling awkward stories or saying anything that could cause embarrassment.

There's no need to repeat your daughter's resume and life events word for word. "Leave the timeline of her entire life out of your speech, and instead focus on two to three major moments," Peterson says.

Don't diss the in-laws. "The bridal shower is one of the last celebrations before the wedding itself, and it's meant to be a joyous occasion," Dennis says. "Bringing up uncomfortable situations or making jabs at your new in-laws will never go over well."

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