10 Heartwarming Nicknames for Your Mother-in-Law

When Mrs. sounds too formal, and Mom feels slightly awkward, what should you do? There are no hard and fast rules when it comes to nicknames for a mother-in-law, which means you have an endless number of options.

But having a name to call her is one of the first steps to getting along with your mother-in-law (how close can you be with someone who you avoid addressing by name at all costs?!). Mom might seem like the obvious nickname, but that's not necessarily the go-to for most couples.

"Some people easily fall into calling their mother-in-law 'Mom,' while for others, that doesn't feel natural or comfortable. It all depends on the relationship, family dynamics, and personal comfort," explains psychotherapist Malka Shaw, LCSW.

Luckily, you can make a nickname whatever you want it to be. It doesn't need to be traditional or conventionally used for mother-in-laws; it just has to make sense for you.

Cheryl Groskopf, LMFT, LPCC, of Evolution to Healing says. "The important thing is that whatever you call her actually fits how you feel about the relationship, not what you think is expected."

Want to find the nickname that feels right for your mother-in-law? Here's how to choose a nickname for your mother-in-law, along with 10 heartwarming examples.

In this article:

• How to Choose a Nickname for Your Mother-in-Law
• How to Bring Up a Nickname With Your Mother-in-Law
• The Best Nicknames for Your Mother-in-Law

How to Choose a Nickname for Your Mother-in-Law

While you can let a nickname evolve naturally, choosing a nickname for your mother-in-law isn't always as organic as falling into a nickname for your partner. It's slightly more loaded, especially if you're both still navigating the early days of your relationship and figuring out where you both stand.

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Choosing a nickname can be one of those meaningful questions to ask your mother-in-law early on, and giving her a say in the matter could help deepen your relationship or tell you a little more about how she views her role when it comes to you.

Susan Trombetti, matchmaker and CEO of Exclusive Matchmaking, explains, "It really depends on the type of relationship you both have. Are you both warm and effusive? Is it a more formal or informal relationship? Does she mind being called by a nickname or did she ask?" But, generally, there should be a conversation—you shouldn't just start calling her a random nickname one day and hope for the best (how would she know that she's now being referred to as Mimi?).

If you still can't broach the conversation, or nothing has come up that feels right, just wait it out. Worst case scenario, if you have kids, the name will come. "When the kids are born, they usually come up with their own names for their grandmother. You can always fall back on that name, although that could be a bit down the road," Trombetti says.

How to Bring Up a Nickname With Your Mother-in-Law

If you do decide to have the conversation, approach it warmly, emphasizing that you want the two of you to have something you share. You don't want to simply call her the same name that everyone else does. You want it to feel more intimate.

Shaw suggests saying something like, "I appreciate how welcoming you are, and I'd love to find something special that works for both of us." She recommends keeping the conversation warm, but also respecting your own comfort level with the relationship and any nickname.

Bring up the conversation in a moment when you two are having a casual conversation, and keep the focus on deepening your relationship. Groskopf explains, "If you want to be intentional about it, just ask her. A simple, 'I don't want to be too formal, but I also don't want to assume anything—what do you like to be called?' keeps things open while also respecting her preferences."

And what do you do if your mother-in-law keeps pushing for you to call her Mom? "If you don't want to call her Mom, you don't have to. Period. But if she's pushing for it, there's a reason—and it's usually more about her than you. Maybe she sees it as a sign of family unity, or maybe she just doesn't like the idea of being on the outside of your and your partner's relationship," Groskopf says.

The Best Nicknames for Your Mother-in-Law

Look at a nickname as an opportunity to celebrate your MIL. "A nickname can be a combination of something special between the two of you based on a shared, funny experience or something more about her personality," Trombetti says. Here are some sweet nicknames for your mother-in-law.

Imma

A nickname can be an opportunity to both honor your mother-in-law and your culture. "After a conversation with my mother-in-law, I called her Imma, the Hebrew word for mother. It felt like a way to honor our relationship while still keeping a distinction between her and my mom," Shaw says.

Suegra

If you or your partner have Spanish heritage, then using the word for mother-in-law in Spanish can be a lovely way to honor your heritage and have a beautiful word to call your mother-in-law. Similarly, mother-in-law in Italian is suocera.

Mama [First Name]

Combining the idea of Mom with her name might be a more casual, natural way to approach a nickname. "Adding her first name can be a great middle ground. The goal isn't just finding a name—it's about building a relationship based on mutual understanding, connection and respect," Shaw says.

Mama [Interest]

Play off of her interests. Trombetti explains, "If she likes to bake, she could be sugar mama or mama cookie. If she is into fashion, it could be something around fashion. The choices are endless depending on her personality."

Moms

Choosing just a slight variation on Mom can be a fun play on the word that makes it feel more comfortable. Try adding an s. It turns Mom into an entirely new sound that feels fun and approachable.

Mimi

Mimi often gets used as a grandmother's name, so, if you plan on having kids, why not jump ahead a bit? Go ahead and start calling your mother-in-law Mimi now. It's a cute name that's just close enough to Mom.

Belle-mère

Belle-mère means mother-in-law in French, but it also translates directly to beautiful mother. Who will complain about a nickname like that?

Miss [First Name]

It's less formal than Mrs. but Miss still feels a bit more classic than calling your mother-in-law by Mama [First Name]. It has a little bit of a preschool teacher vibe, but in a way that feels warm and welcoming.

Yuèmǔ

Yuèmǔ means mother-in-law in Chinese, and it's a beautiful word that flows as easily as any first name. This could be your go-to if you want to stick to something traditional, but don't want to feel too stuffy.

Big Mama

If your mother-in-law has a big personality and she knows it, then there's nothing better than Big Mama. This is just the right nickname for the mother-in-law that's a strong patriarch and a force to be reckoned with.

Skip a Nickname Altogether

Lastly, you don't have to choose a motherly nickname! "If you grew up in a family where nicknames were a sign of closeness, it might feel totally natural to give your mother-in-law one," Groskopf says. However, not everyone is comfortable with nicknames, and it could feel inauthentic.