How to Help Your Partner Achieve Their Goals

Learning how to help your partner achieve their goals is one of the most important ways to strengthen your relationship. Your romantic partner should be by your side for all your life challenges, so being able to be a supportive presence as they develop and grow is paramount to fostering a healthy relationship. Whether your significant other has a specific goal they are working toward—like running a marathon or a New Year's resolution—or a broader goal like achieving career success, it's helpful to learn techniques to be a thoughtful, encouraging and positive force as they take steps toward their destination. Ahead, we break down eight pieces of advice for how to motivate your partner and be a support as they work toward any goal.

1. Encourage Your Partner

Being a supportive partner begins with being a positive force in their life. Providing encouragement along their journey is absolutely essential to help them achieve their goals. Encouraging your partner can come in many forms, from offering praise for their efforts, words of affirmation, providing practical help when needed, and expressing your belief in their ability to achieve whatever they are going after. Think of yourself as their cheerleader as they strive to achieve whatever they put their mind to.

2. Practice Active Listening

When your partner is talking through their goals—whether they are formulating them or working through the process of achieving them—active listening is an extremely valuable practice to follow. Active listening involves paying close attention to both the verbal and nonverbal communication a person expresses, thinking thoughtfully about their statements, asking clarifying questions, reflecting on what they say back to them and expressing empathy. Rather than giving your opinion without actually listening to what they are saying, active listening allows you to learn how to support your partner by fully considering their thoughts and feelings before offering any counsel.

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3. Give Thoughtful Feedback

Once you actively listen and have an informed perspective on your partner's path toward their goals, it can be helpful to give them feedback. The key is to do so thoughtfully without criticizing them and only when they are really looking for advice. Of course, it's possible you aren't an expert in the field where they are trying to achieve a goal. For instance, you might not be in the career field in which they are working toward their promotion or don't have experience running a marathon. It's best to come with advice that touches on what you can give your perspective on, whether that is creating relationships with colleagues and clients or how to put yourself in a better headspace to approach a challenge.

4. Avoid Being Pushy

While feedback can be extremely beneficial, there's a fine line between being helpful and giving too much unprompted advice. It's important to understand how much feedback your partner really wants and needs. Too much unsolicited advice might make them feel as if you are trying to control the situation and don't trust your partner to be able to achieve their goals on their own.

5. Be a Strategy Sounding Board

In some cases, your partner may need to work on developing a strategy or timeline to achieve a goal. If they ask for help, you can absolutely help them curate that strategy and be a sounding board for them as they work through each step. Ways to play a supportive role can include taking notes, building out a calendar during your discussion or offering suggestions to optimize their plans.

6. Celebrate Their Achievements

Celebrating all the wins along the way—even the smallest ones—is one of the best ways to support your partner as they move toward completing their goals. Pop some bubbly, bring them flowers, or even just give a sincere congratulations when they make those important steps that get them toward the finish line.

7. Don't Nag

While it's important to check in about their progress, try to keep those comments in a positive light and at a reasonable frequency. Asking if someone completed a task can easily feel like nagging if done in the wrong tone, and it happens far too often. It's best to ask if your partner wants you to hold them accountable for meeting goal markers. Unsolicited reminders could weigh on them otherwise.

8. Strive for a Goal Together

One way to really feel like a team when working toward a goal is to do it together. Whether you're working toward a marriage goal, trying to get healthier or are trying to step up at work, having someone by your side that is going through a similar challenge can be a real comfort. You can both help each other stay accountable to the task, and celebrate your successes together.