The Secret to Sleep the Night Before Your Wedding Day

It's true—the butterflies in your stomach will definitely disturb your beauty rest. But here's how to avoid tossing and turning all night so you can feel your best on your wedding day.
rachel torgerson the knot bridal fashion expert
Rachel Torgerson
rachel torgerson the knot bridal fashion expert
Rachel Torgerson
Bridal Fashion Expert
  • Rachel Torgerson is a New York-based journalist and social media professional.
  • Rachel is a Senior Fashion Editor for Cosmopolitan.
  • Rachel worked for The Knot as an Assistant Editor and Editorial Assistant.
Updated Apr 25, 2018

Let's be honest—you're probably not going to get a ton of sleep the night before your wedding. But if you let your mind-racing (over minutae like the guest list, the flowers and the weekend timeline) keep you up at night, you'll end up utterly exhausted on your wedding day, and obviously, you don't want that.

That's why we talked to three experts about what it takes to get great sleep. And they let us in on a little secret: It's vital to create and stick to a sleep schedule in the weeks leading up to your wedding so you don't end up overly tired, over-stressed, or worse—sick—on your wedding day.

How To Create A Sleep Schedule

No less than three weeks before the wedding, create a sleep cycle for yourself. This means pick a bed time (like you would for a child), and a time to wake up each day. Then stick to it—even on the weekends. We know it's hard to resist the urge of sleeping in late on Saturday, but Dr. Helene Emsellem, Director of The Center for Sleep & Wake Disorders and a Clinical Professor of Neurology, says to try not to waver too much on the time you go to bed and the time you wake up. At most, you should be waking up and going to bed each night within the same two-hour window. And, even if you don't fall asleep at the right time, you should still wake up at your designated wake time to stick to your schedule, adds Dr. Michael Breus, Diplomate and Fellow of the American Board of Sleep Medicine and author of Beauty Sleep.

With all of the sleep expertise on our hands, we ended up with a short list of tips for getting better shut-eye in the days leading up to the wedding. Maybe you've heard of a few of them (like, don't drink coffee before bed!), but if you're serious about feeling rested and refreshed before the wedding, read them and make them a part of your sleep routine.

1. Get Sunlight

Every morning, get at least 15 minutes of sunlight. "Even if it's a cloudy day, just going outside and getting some of those UV rays is good. Because the sun resets your internal clock—what we call your circadian rhythm," says Dr. Breus.

2. Wind Down

As early as an hour before you go to bed, and no later than fifteen minutes before you sleep, you should create a wind-down routine. That means dimming the lights, switching off your emails, maybe listening to a comforting playlist and disengaging from the world. "Dimming the lights helps your brain get the clue that you're going to try to sleep," says Dr. Emsellem. "Going from bright light to darkness is very difficult."

3. Start Exercising

"Exercise is a known stress reducer and a known sleep improver," says Dr. Breus. "People who excersize regularly have a higher quality of sleep." If you want to take this a step further, you can even try doing a few relaxing yoga poses before bed with some meditation to help you get in a restful mood.

4. Quit the Caffeine

We're not saying you need to toss out your Keurig, but it might be helpful to switch to decaf and avoid chocolate, soda and some teas after 4 p.m. "Most people don't realize that caffeine has a half-life of between 8 to 10 hours and it can affect your ability to fall asleep as well as your ability to stay asleep," he adds.

5. Avoid Alcohol

"Some people think it's a good idea to have a few glasses of wine before bed, but that never turns out particularly well," explains Dr. Breus. "Your sleep quality will go down, and you'll get dehydrated, so I always dissuade the idea of alcohol. It just doesn't work."

6. Pull the Plug on Your Electronics

For some of us, the blue light found in tablets and phones actually signals daytime to our brains, says Dr. Jordan Stern of The Comprehensive Sleep and Snoring Center in New York, NY. Disengaging from social media, emails and text messages will also draw your mind away from the types of thoughts that can jolt you back into a state of anxious wakefulness. "The idea that one can go from working and doing things to immediately falling asleep is fraught with problems," Dr. Emsellem says. "It's really hard to switch modes directly from awake activity to sleep." At the very least, turn your iPhone's Night Shift on, which adjusts the amount of blue light your phone emits.

7. Soothe Yourself

Doctors suggest getting your mind ready for sleep with a hot bath or warm shower before your bed time, which increases your body's core temperature before dramatically dropping it. This gives a cue to your body that you're ready for bed. Add the scent of lavender to the bath or drink a cup of chamomile tea to truly let the calming effect sink in.

8. Write Down a List of To-Dos

"Our minds are very powerful and if you're drifting off to sleep, but you start to think and worry, your heart rate goes up, your respiratory rate goes up, you sweat, you get anxious and all of those things are counter-productive to sleep," says Dr. Emsellem. If your mind is still racing as you're hopping into bed, get out a pen and paper and write down the list of things that are keeping you up with potential solutions. "One thing I have my brides do the night before the wedding is write down a list of all the things they have concerns about, then jotting down a quick solution," says Dr. Breus. "The solution could be as simple as calling your planner to deal with the situation in the morning." As long as your brain feels like you've addressed the problem, and created a solution, you have a good chance of letting it go. "The fact of the matter is that you can't do anything about it at night except worry."

9. Distract Yourself

If all else fails, really try to distract yourself. Create a sleep playlist using songs without any words, or with soothing sounds to keep your mind off the things that are keeping it up. Then practice progressive muscle relaxation by tensing and relaxing muscles consecutively, from your toes to your head. "Start with your feet and curl your toes, then relax them, then flex your feet backwards toward your head, then relax, then move to your calves and your thighs, all the way up to your head," Dr. Breus says. "By going through this process, you reduce your level of stress and anxiety. I usually have people practice this at least a week before the wedding, so they get used to it."

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