How Long Should You Date Before Moving In Together?

You've been dating for a while, and you spend every waking second together anyway, or maybe you're considering U-Hauling it up with your new girlfriend—either way, the question remains: How long should you date before moving in together?

"This ranges from couple to couple," Marisa T. Cohen, PhD, a dating and relationship expert at Hily, tells The Knot. "For example, in many cities where the cost of living is high, couples may choose to move in together sooner if they are already spending a lot of time at one another's places, or the timing of lease agreements fit."

But whether you're in the talking stage, a committed relationship not yet sharing a household, or you're just really into someone, how long should you date someone before moving in together? Find out whether you should (or should not) make the move.

In this article:

• How Long Should You Date Before Moving in Together?
• How Long Do Average Couples Date Before Moving in Together?
• How to Know if You're Ready to Move in Together
• What if You're Not Ready to Move in Together?

How Long Should You Date Before Moving in Together?

First things first: How long should couples date before making the big move? The answer, as you might assume, is a little more complicated than one specific number. After all, according to Cohen, a lot of factors go into making the decision: the strength of the relationship, outside factors such as finances and rental agreements and even cultural factors.

"There is no 'normal' when it comes to the length of time a couple should be together before cohabitating," she says. "Each relationship has a different momentum. So, for example, in three to six months, you may have couples who see each other multiple times per week and have already integrated one another into their lives, and for others, they may have only gone on a few dates."

The questions a couple should really ask, she says, is if they feel ready to move in together and if they feel comfortable tackling any challenges that they may face after they make this transition.

FEATURED VIDEO FROM THE KNOT

How Long Do Average Couples Date Before Moving in Together?

That all aside, how long do couples date before moving in together, on average? If you want help with moving in with your partner, it can be helpful to start with data. According to The Knot's 2024 Relationship & Intimacy study, it was found that, on average, 26% of unmarried couples moved in together within less than six months of dating, while 35% moved in after six to 11 months of courting one another.

For couples who are now married, 35% said they waited one to two years before packing boxes. On average, though, the most likely timing was reported to be anywhere from six months to one year of dating.

How to Know if You're Ready to Move in Together

How can you know when the time is the right time? We get it, living together is a big deal. Luckily, there are a few ways to tell that it's truly time, no matter how long you've been together.

You're Both on Solid Ground

"If partners feel that their relationship is on solid ground and they feel confident talking through issues as they arise, they are in a good spot," Cohen explains.

Sharing Needs Comes Second Nature

Another sign that closing the distance is the next step? According to Cohen, if both partners are able to share their needs and problem-solve together—rather than keeping issues bottled up—then you're in a much better position to consider cohabitation.

You've Discussed the Future

"If you've discussed your future together and are on the same page, as well as have discussed the finances and responsibilities associated with the move, you're likely ready," Cohen says.

What if You're Not Ready to Move in Together?

Perhaps an even more important question than "How long do people date before moving in together?" is "What if you're not ready to move in together?" Maybe you're looking to avoid roommate syndrome, or you're just not sure if living together is for you. If that's you, it's okay! Here are some things to do instead.

Be Open and Honest

You should never rush something you're not ready for. Instead, try to be open and honest about wanting more time. "Pushing forward and doing something you're not ready to do will put you in an uncomfortable position and can lead to a building up of resentment over time," Cohen explains.

Be Direct About Your 'Why'

"It's also best to be direct and provide the 'why' behind the 'what,'" Cohen says. "If you know why you need more time, let your partner know so that they have a better understanding of where you stand."

Above all, remember: Celebrate moving in together when the timing is right for both of you. That way, you're more likely to last and build an even stronger relationship than you ever thought possible. If it's what you both choose, happy moving! If not, you can still work on building your relationship to where you both feel most comfortable and confident.