What to Know About Sharing Pronouns at a Wedding

Make it easy for wedding guests to understand everyone's gender-affirming pronouns.

How to Share Your Wedding Pronouns Throughout Your Celebration

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Updated Jun 24, 2025

Sharing pronouns and adhering to thoughtful pronoun etiquette is one of the best ways to make your wedding an even more joyful and inclusive life event. Whether you are hosting a LGBTQIA+ wedding or just want to be respectful of all of your guests, taking the extra step to make sure everyone's gender-affirming pronouns are used is an essential way to make everyone feel welcome at your celebration.

From using gender-neutral wedding language to creating ways to inform guests and vendors how to address each other properly, we rounded up expert-backed tips on how to make your wedding an inclusive place. Read ahead to foster an environment full of love and acceptance.

In this article:

How to Share Pronouns with Wedding Guests
How to Share Pronouns with Wedding Vendors
Written Pronoun Etiquette for Weddings
Pronoun Usage Throughout the Ceremony & Reception
Wedding Pronoun Pins

To ensure guests can properly respect your own and each other's pronouns, the most important thing you can do is understand and acknowledge everyone's affirming pronouns. While you obviously should use the correct pronouns for yourselves and any members of the wedding party that you include on your wedding website, NYC and Los Angeles-based wedding planner Jason Mitchell Kahn says it's also a great opportunity to inform guests further about proper usage ahead of the celebration. "Include a short 'About Us' or FAQ section with your names, pronouns and a simple note. You can also include a brief note on why pronouns matter—especially for guests who may not be familiar," he says.

As you are getting RSVPs, you can also make sure you are affirming your guests' identities in future wedding communications by asking for pronouns in their responses. "We collect addresses, dietary restrictions and song requests, so it's not odd to add this field for guests when they reply," Kahn says. "You can add text above the question for guests stating what your pronouns are, why using the right ones is important and then offer that level of respect to your guests."

You can also make a note for all guests to respect one another's pronouns in your invitations or email communications. Khan suggests, "If you send out a welcome letter via email or print when people arrive, it's an ideal opportunity to say something like: 'As we come together, we want to create a space where everyone feels included. As the couple getting married, we wanted to share our pronouns. If you hear other guests sharing theirs throughout the weekend, please join us in making this a weekend that is inclusive for all!'"

On the day of the wedding, you can place notes on signage or in programs reminding guests to use affirming pronouns. Another way to make your wedding more gender-inclusive is to provide tasteful pronoun pins that guests can choose to wear on their attire.

When communicating with wedding vendors, ensure that they address you and your partner correctly to foster a relationship of respect. Being able to share your pronouns early, as well as asking for theirs, can be a great way to begin your communication. If you are chatting over email, you can put your pronouns within your email signature or write a sentence within the body of your email sharing both your pronouns. If you are meeting for the first time in person, you can share your pronouns while introducing yourself. It's also a good idea if you are working with LGBTQIA+-friendly vendors with a larger team to let your point of contact know that they should inform their employees of your or your guests' gay or lesbian wedding pronouns, as well, so there aren't any misunderstandings.

Written Pronoun Etiquette for Weddings

Want to get all the details about how to share your pronouns throughout your wedding? See some guidance ahead.

Wedding Invitations

It's important to include proper pronouns for any person mentioned within your LGBTQIA wedding invitation wording. You can keep invitations totally gender-neutral or make sure pronouns are properly mentioned.

Jamie would like to formally invite you to share in a celebration of love with their partner, John.
Jack, child of Joseph and Mary, and Cecilia, child of Nicole and Jane, request the honor of your presence on their wedding day.

Wedding Website

There are a few opportunities for pronouns sharing on wedding websites. Khan suggests giving guests a heads up to respect pronouns within the FAQ section of your site. His suggestion is to write the following:

We use she/her and he/him pronouns. We're asking all our guests to respect everyone's identities and use correct pronouns throughout the weekend!

If you are listing the names and details of your wedding party, you can also include their pronouns after their names.

Terri Blanc (she/her)

Josie Smith (she/they)

Jimmy Houseman (he/him)

Signs

If you would like to inform guests of your pronouns via wedding signage, Khan suggests adding a small note on a wedding welcome sign. The wording could read as follows:

We believe everyone deserves to be seen and respected. Our personal pronouns are Bride: Evie (she/her) and Groom: Mitch (they/them).

Wedding Programs

A wedding program is a wonderful opportunity to share information with your guests. This is a great spot to put a note similar to the example shown for signs. You'll likely list the names of your wedding party members, so this is a great opportunity to include their pronouns afterward, so guests are aware.

Bridal Party:

Ali Park (she/her)

Beatriz Gomez (she/her)

Hannah Jones (she/they)

James Smith (he/they)

Wedding Place Cards

If you want to help guests identify the proper pronouns of their seatmates at their table, you can include pronouns next to their names on wedding place cards or seating charts.

Table Five:

Janet Lund (she/her)

Grace Phuyen (they/them)

Gregory Pine (he/him)

Talia Hoyt (she/they)

Brandon Paul (he/him)

Wedding Card Messages

When writing other wedding card messages to your guests, like thank you notes, always remember to properly observe their pronouns as well as titles to address the cards.

To Mx. Jones,

Thank you for sending the beautiful registry gift.

Pronoun Usage Throughout the Ceremony & Reception

While written reminders of how to use proper pronouns are helpful, making sure that they are spoken properly at all times is absolutely essential at your wedding. Ahead, see ways to adjust your ceremony script and wedding traditions to accommodate everyone's pronouns.

Ceremony Script

It's important for your officiant to respect and use your proper pronouns throughout your wedding day. First, be sure to inform them of the pronouns that you regularly use so they can incorporate them into their script. It's also a good idea to give your officiant examples of inclusive wedding ceremony scripts that use more gender-neutral language if you want to eliminate more gendered language from the ceremony.

We are gathered here today to celebrate and witness the union of (insert name) and (insert name).

Ceremony Readings

If a friend or family member is planning to do a reading for your wedding, your officiant will likely introduce them before they come up to the altar. Be sure to inform your officiant of all pronouns and name pronunciations for these speakers.

I would like to introduce Jess Flowers. They will be reading a poem for the couple.

Marriage Pronouncement

While traditionally in Western weddings, couples were pronounced "husband and wife," this terminology doesn't hold for many LGBTQ+ couples or at nonbinary weddings. Instead, there are some alternatives to "you may kiss the bride." You can adjust it for any gay or lesbian wedding pronouns or keep the script gender-neutral.

I now pronounce you married. You may kiss your spouse.
It is my pleasure to present to you, for the first time as newlyweds, (insert name) and (insert name).
I now pronounce you husband and husband. You may kiss the groom.

Reception Entrance

As you enter the reception for the first time as newlyweds, the DJ or bandleader emceeing the evening can announce you to your guests. This is not the time for them to mistake your pronouns or gender identity. Make sure to clarify both your pronouns and how you would like to be announced ahead of time. You or your planner can ask your wedding DJ to follow a script, as well as remind them how to pronounce names.

Please welcome, for the first time as newlyweds, Mr. and Mr. Wen and George Lee-Johnson!

Wedding Speeches

Another occasion an emcee will make announcements is to ask those giving wedding speeches to come to the microphone. Once again, you should provide a list of who these people are, their pronouns, and their relationship to you so they can be properly introduced.

Next up, may the parent of newlywed Jess come to the microphone. They would like to share a few special words about their child.

Wedding Pronoun Pins

If you want to make it easy for all guests to identify their pronouns with each other, pronouns pins can help. Buy these in bulk and put them in an easy-to-spot place (such as near the guest book) so when guests enter, they can easily pick one up to fasten to their attire.

What to Know About Sharing Pronouns at a Wedding

How to Share Pronouns with Wedding Guests

How to Share Pronouns with Wedding Vendors