Here's How Many Couples Discuss Marriage Long Before a Proposal

You might be surprised by how many couples talk about tying the knot more than two years before actually getting engaged.
sophie ross the knot bridal fashion and beauty expert
Sophie Ross
sophie ross the knot bridal fashion and beauty expert
Sophie Ross
Bridal Fashion and Beauty Expert
  • Sophie Ross is a Senior Copywriter at Adore Me.
  • Sophie is an experienced style and beauty writer.
  • Sophie worked as an Associate Editor for The Knot from 2017 to 2019.

The act of "popping the question" typically doesn't pop up out of nowhere. According to our new Jewelry & Engagement Study—which surveyed more than 14,000 engaged or newly married couples across the United States—one in four couples (24 percent) report discussing marriage two years or more (!) before actually getting engaged.

In other words, engagements are quickly becoming more of a conversation between a couple and less of a singular decision of the individual who's buying the ring. This also doesn't come as much surprise considering one in three (33 percent) couples shop for the engagement ring together prior to a proposal, per our study.

Even if it's not entirely a surprise, proposers are still putting enormous amounts of effort into planning the perfect proposal—4 in 10 proposers report "meticulously" planning the act of popping the question down to the last detail, while spending around 4.4 months, on average, strategizing before getting down on one knee.

In addition to discussing marriage itself, a staggering majority of couples are candid in considering other important topics together before getting engaged, including having children (96 percent), finances (90 percent), pets (80 percent), sex (80 percent) and religion (79 percent).

Holding important conversations before getting engaged—including the act of getting engaged itself—is the best way to gauge that you're a good long-term match with your partner, and that you're on the same page. So if you ask us, this is a step in the right direction that couples should take before walking down the aisle.

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