This Is How to Know if You're Ready for Marriage

Ready, set, marriage?
Couple smiling and looking at engagement ring, how to know if you're ready for marriage
Photo: The Knot Original Photography by Gieves Anderson
Hayley Folk
by
Hayley Folk
Hayley Folk
Hayley Folk
The Knot Contributor
  • Hayley writes articles on a freelance basis for The Knot Worldwide, with a specialty in sex and relationships.
  • Her work has appeared in The Knot, Cosmopolitan, Refinery29 and more.
  • Prior to The Knot Worldwide, Hayley was a full-time editor at a business publication.
Updated Sep 05, 2024

You've been dating a while, you met their family and maybe you even moved in together. Let's face it: You're in a committed relationship. But are you both ready to take that commitment all the way? It might be time to understand how to know if you're ready for marriage (or not).

For Mollie Candib, a psychotherapist and owner of MSC Therapy based in New York City, knowing if you're ready for marriage comes from having a strong foundation of trust, mutual respect and shared commitment to making the partnership work—but other relationship green flags could point to the altar, too.

Are you (or your partner) feeling ready for marriage? Is there a way to recognize how you know you want to marry someone? With expertise from Candib and The Knot 2024 Relationship and Intimacy Study, we've got just the answers for how to know if saying "I do" is in the cards for you both.

In this article:

How to Know if You're Ready for Marriage

A tale as old as time: You spend a few years with someone only to wonder if the two of you should take that next step or if marriage just isn't for you as a couple. Luckily, there are tried-and-true ways to know if you're ready for marriage.

"A couple is ready for marriage when they have a deep understanding of each other's values, life goals and expectations for the future," Candib says. "And they are able to communicate openly and resolve conflicts in a healthy manner." When you have a strong foundation of trust, mutual respect, shared commitment and a feeling of being fully known by your partner, then it's quite possible that you are ready for marriage, you just have to have the courage to take that leap into marital bliss.

Signs Your Relationship Is Ready for Marriage

If you're still not sure, that's OK—there are signs to look out for that might help you determine how to know if you're ready for marriage.

1. You and Your Partner Have Discussed Marriage

Perhaps the number one sign of how you know you want to marry someone, according to The Knot 2024 Relationship and Intimacy Study, is if you've actually discussed it. In fact, 74 percent of folks said they knew they were ready because they discussed marriage and the future of their relationship. It's called having future vision. For Candib, if you're talking about visions for the future, like potentially getting hitched, it's a pretty good indicator of how to know if you're ready for marriage.

2. You Get Along With Each Other's Family and Friends

Another big sign: You both get along with each other's family and friends. In our intimacy study, 47 percent of folks said they knew they were ready for the big commitment when they were able to introduce them to their closest family and friends. Of course, everyone's family situation is different. But if you and your partner are introducing you to their closest circle of people, that's a pretty significant sign that you're both ready for marriage.

3. You Both Want (or Don't Want) Children

Maybe you both really want to start a family—or maybe you don't. Either way, if you share core values like this, Candib says that it could be a marker of how to tell if you're ready for marriage. Plus, 50 percent of folks knew they were ready for marriage when their partner expressed wanting to have children or didn't and it matched up with their own wishes.

4. You Have Open Communication

How do you know when to marry someone? As they say, communication is key. Sixty-eight percent of folks in the study expressed that they saw marriage in sight when it felt both easy and enjoyable to talk to their partner all the time. "If both partners feel comfortable discussing anything, from daily routines to deep-seated fears and aspirations, without fear of judgment, then it's a go," Candib says.

5. You Resolve Conflicts Together

Another way to tell if you're ready for marriage? Candib says that if you and your partner handle disagreements with respect, without resorting to blame or hurtful behavior and are willing to compromise, then that's a pretty great sign.

6. You Trust Each Other Deeply

We've all been in relationships, romantic or not, where trust has been broken. But when you know you're ready for marriage the trust is strong. You and your partner are honest with each other about everything: your feelings, thoughts and even actions.

7. You Support Each Other

Do you and your partner support each other's individual growth? Are you excited about growing together as a team? It turns out, Candib explains, this is another way to tell if you're ready for marriage or not.

8. Your Sex Life Is What You Want It to Be

In The Knot study, 67 percent of folks knew they were really ready for marriage when the sexual attraction and chemistry were there from the start. Plus, 43 percent said they were able to start thinking about the future as soon as they started being intimate with their lover. Sex is important, and for some relationships, it's very important. If your sex life is on fire, or you find that you're just both incredibly satisfied, it's a good way to tell if you'd make great spouses.

9. You Align on Financial Transparency

There are many things you should discuss before marriage: Money is one of them. "If you and your partner have discussed and agreed upon financial goals and spending habits and are transparent about your own financial situations, then you can consider marriage, too," Candib says.

10. Wanting a Long-Term Commitment

How do you know you want to marry someone? For starters, if there is a feeling of long-term commitment—like how 50 percent of folks said they loved each other early on or 44 percent moved in together—it's safe to say there is a want for something more.

That more could be marriage. If both partners are genuinely committed to staying together for the long haul—not just during the good times but through challenges as well—then we think that's definitely a good cause for marriage.

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