Here's How to Strengthen a Relationship With Your Partner

It doesn't matter how long you've been with your sweetheart—five weeks or five decades—taking intentional time to learn how to strengthen a relationship is paramount to your individual happiness and collective satisfaction and pride in your partnership. Strengthening your relationship skills can be done through tiny, consistent acts and grand gestures alike and the payoff is worth all your effort.

"It's such a common belief that once a relationship is established, the hard work is done. But in reality, that's just the beginning! Think of a relationship like a beautiful garden: It flourishes with care and attention but can wither without it," says Dr. Patricia Dixon, PsyD, a licensed clinical psychologist, relationship expert and life coach. She adds, "When you actively nurture your connection, you're showing your partner that you truly value them and appreciate their presence in your life."

Whether you're here to learn how to strengthen a relationship with your boyfriend or girlfriend or a long-term partner, fiancé or spouse, follow this expert advice and you'll be golden.

1. Never Stop Dating Each Other

One of the most important pieces of advice you'll ever hear when it comes to learning how to improve and strengthen your relationship is to never stop dating each other. Keeping the flame aglow is crucial.

"Regular dates infuse excitement into your relationship and allow you to explore new experiences together," Dr. Dixon explains. "It's a beautiful commitment to prioritize quality time with one another." She suggests taking turns planning fun dates and surprises that reflect each other's interests.

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2. Make Gentle Requests vs. Giving Excessive Criticism

No doubt our partners will grate on us in one way or another or make mistakes along this journey we call life. Gentle requests will take you much further in your partnership compared to incessant criticism, which damages the foundation of your partnership.

"That means saying what you have to say in a respectful way when you're feeling calm—not when you're feeling provoked," says Dr. Joshua Coleman, PhD, a psychologist and author. "Also don't overwhelm your partner with your complaints. Studies show that there should be a 5:1 ratio of positive to negative experiences in a relationship."

3. Remind Yourself Why You Fell in Love

Okay, so hearing them chew in that weird way or picking up their shoes for the zillionth time might wear on you. Here's the thing, though: You fell madly in love with your partner for a reason. Dr. Dixon says, "When you start seeing your partner only as a spouse or partner, it's easy to take them for granted. Keep that spark by appreciating them as the unique person you fell in love with."

4. Understand Your Partner's Vulnerabilities

One of the key steps when figuring out how to strengthen your relationship with your partner is to take care to really, truly, deeply know and understand them (this includes knowing their love language). "It's important to be aware of the areas where your partner is especially vulnerable," Dr. Coleman says. "This might be around feelings of shame, abandonment, rejection or guilt. These areas require that you be especially sensitive and conscientious."

5. Express Gratitude Daily

A little appreciation and words of affirmation go a long way when learning how to strengthen your love relationship (or any relationship, for that matter). Dr. Dixon says, "Recognizing and expressing gratitude for the small things your partner does fosters a positive atmosphere in your relationship and strengthens your emotional connection." Write these things down and think about them on your own, but also make sure to vocalize them to your partner.

6. Apologize and Put Ego Aside

Everyone makes mistakes and inadvertently hurts their partner. This is par for the relationship course. Apologizing, even if you felt you didn't do anything wrong (or even if your partner was in the wrong, too), simply shows that you care about your partner's feelings and that you're putting your relationship above ego. Dr. Coleman says, "It's important to apologize and take responsibility for the hurt that you caused." Those two simple words can go much further than you may realize.

7. Stay Curious About Them

One of the most wonderful things about being in a relationship is that our partner gives us an opportunity to learn about and feel excited about new things. Plus, it's so hot to watch them thrive in their passions and hobbies.

"Actively encourage each other's hobbies and passions," Dr. Dixon insists. "Show genuine curiosity about what makes your partner tick. Celebrate their individuality and make time for them to pursue their interests. This keeps your bond strong and vibrant."

8 . Don't Let Anger or Resentment Fester

When your partner upsets or irritates you, it's important to discuss this immediately and work through it together. Otherwise, you risk building resentment which, according to the Gottman Institute, is the strongest predictor of a relationship's demise since it signifies a decline into toxicity, lack of communication and feelings of hopelessness.

Contempt involves expressing superiority, mockery or disdain, often through sarcasm or eye-rolling. This behavior conveys disrespect and emotional detachment, eroding trust and connection.

9. Check in Routinely

You know how you take your car in for maintenance routinely or water your plants on schedule? Doing the same with your partnership is key when learning how to strengthen your relationship with your spouse.

"Regular check-ins are like a relationship tune-up. Set aside time—maybe monthly or quarterly—to discuss what's going well and what could use some improvement," Dr. Dixon suggests. "This fosters open communication and helps you understand each other's needs without guessing."

In the early stages of romance, everything feels blissful, exciting and new. We throw ourselves into the partnership to build a strong foundation, but as time carries on we might forget that nurturing our connection is more important than ever. The healthiest relationships? They're the ones where both partners are committed to a journey of growth together.