How to Write a Letter to Your Son to Read on His Wedding Day

The moments before the wedding are some of the most emotional. Send your son all your love and support with a special message.
Groom reading letter from parents on wedding day
Photo: Photo_sorokin / Shutterstock
Mia Maguire
by Mia Maguire
Updated Nov 22, 2023

You're not losing a son, you're gaining a child. Despite the truth of this adage, dealing with the reality of your son getting married can be a very emotional time in a parent's life. Put those feelings into words with a letter to your son on his wedding day. Delivering a special note for his eyes only is a great way to show your support and genuine love for your son on this most important of days. Naturally, you may feel pressure to write a perfect letter (in addition to choosing a sweet wedding gift for your son) that covers every milestone, everything you adore about him and all of your hopes for his future (you can definitely save some of that for your parent-of-the-groom speech, by the way). This guide will help you identify the most critical elements to include in your letter of gratitude and support, and put you on the right track to writing a message to your son on his wedding day that's emotionally impactful without being cheesy or generic.

In this article:

Wedding Day Letter to Son Template

No matter the exact format or nature of your letter to your son on his wedding day, you'll want to include a few critical elements: personal details specific to you and your son's bond, an explicit expression of your support and love, and a genuine expression of something unique between the two of you. Remember, the goal of your note to your son on his wedding day is not to restate the sentiments already expressed in his wedding card wishes for your son, which could also go to him and his partner, but to add a little more context and personalization. Check out our suggested letter structure below, then grab some stationery and brush up on your parent of the groom duties.

1. A Warm Greeting

Sure, any letter needs an opening introduction, but your son's wedding day is an extra special moment, so it's the perfect opportunity to pour your heart into it. Set the sentimental tone with your greeting and introduction, whether it be by mentioning how proud you are of him or with some reflections on the couple. It's a great time to recall an early, pivotal memory of the two of them, like the moment you knew your son had fallen in love when he brought his partner home for the holidays for the first time or when he told you about the relationship and couldn't hold back his excitement. Either way, your warm opening will set the overall tone for your letter, so make sure to think it through before you put the pen to paper (no pressure, though!).

2. Words of Congratulations

Now it's time to express the obvious: your congratulations. After all, this is one of the biggest days of your son's life and finding a partner to love and cherish is a special thing that doesn't come easily for everyone. Your son's wedding is not only a celebration of the love he has for his future spouse, but it's a huge accomplishment! The wedding day is the ultimate culmination of his bond and commitment to his spouse-to-be, so any letter must include some form of congratulations (even if you assume he already knows how you feel).

3. How Much You Love His Future Spouse

While there are always exceptions, chances are you've spent a good amount of time with your son's fiancé and (we hope!) you've fallen in love with them, too. You can add as much or as little about your son's future spouse as you like, but the letter absolutely should mention them in some way. It's a great opportunity to share a few of your favorite characteristics about them, mention how you feel that they bring out the best in your son or note that it brings you happiness to see him so in love. If you have a favorite memory with your son's future spouse, it's a great moment to reflect on that as well. Perhaps it was when they were up to play a silly game of charades with the whole family that they won you over or maybe it was the first time your son experienced a hardship at work and their support and unconditional love for him was palpable. Of course, you can always share the moment that you, as a parent, knew your son's future spouse was the one for them, too.

4. How Proud You Are of Him

While it doesn't have to be the centerpiece or focal point of your letter to your son on his wedding day (though it certainly can be), mentioning how proud you are of him is an important highlight that should be addressed. Cultivating a healthy romantic relationship culminating in marriage suggests that your son is a great partner—and hey, you had a key role in the great partner is and will continue to be as he enters his marriage—whether you led by example in your own relationship or just taught him how to be compassionate, reliable, honest and communicative. While your son's wedding day is likely going to be an emotional one full of love, happy tears and lots of hugs, this letter will help you articulate clearly that you couldn't be more proud of the person he has become.

5. Words of Advice for a Healthy Marriage

While you don't want to write a marriage therapy book in your letter or come across as overly preachy (this is not the time to present yourself as *that* mother), offering a few words of wisdom is usually a good way to conclude your letter. These sentiments should be expressed similarly to traditional wedding vows—again, the goal is not to frighten your son by saying how tough marriage can be or that rough times in a relationship are inevitable. Instead, consider mentioning how wonderful it is to have a partner as you go through the ups and downs in life and that this sacred bond is a gift and should always be treated as such.

Wedding Day Letter to Son Example

Naturally, your wedding letter to your son should be specific and based on your own relationship with him, but if you need a little extra guidance on how to get started, how to structure your letter or just some ideas put in action, our sample below can help get you started.

Dear son,

As I sit down to write you this letter on the morning of your wedding day, my heart is a kaleidoscope of emotions. Today marks a significant milestone in your life, a moment that feels like both the blink of an eye and a lifetime of memories rolled into one. From the first time I held you in my arms to witnessing the incredible person you've become, my pride and love for you have only deepened with each passing day. Congratulations to you and [Spouse's Name].

As you stand on the threshold of this new chapter, I want you to know how profoundly happy and blessed I am. Marriage is a journey of two souls weaving their stories together and I have every confidence that the story you create will be a beautiful tapestry of love, understanding and shared dreams.

I will never forget the moment I knew [Spouse's name] was the one. You were going through such a rough time at work, but seeing how they supported you, loved you unconditionally and stood by your side made me fall in love with them, too. I knew you had found your forever person and I am so elated to gain [Spouse's name] as a [son or daughter or child].

Today is a celebration not only of your union, but of the love that has shaped you into the remarkable person you are. Your journey with [Spouse's Name] is a continuation of the love and values we've instilled in you, and we couldn't be prouder. Remember that you have a strong foundation of support, not just from each other, but from the family and friends surrounding you today.

Remember, my son, that love is not just a feeling—it's a choice, a commitment to stand by each other through thick and thin. Embrace the joys, navigate the challenges and relish the ordinary moments that make a life extraordinary. I have witnessed the love between you two blossom and it warms our hearts to see the genuine happiness you've found in each other.

Love,

Your [Mom, Dad, Parents]

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