Bachelorette Party: What if Maid of Honor Won't Plan Bachelorette Party?


My maid of honor recently told me that she's too stressed out planning my bridal shower to also plan a bachelorette party. I thought it was a bit rude, but also, I've really been looking forward to having a fun last night out. Would it be wrong for me to drop a hint with another bridesmaid that I would like one?


So long as it is along the lines of "dropping a hint" (and not making a list of demands), yes, you certainly should. While it wasn't terribly tactful for your MOH to announce that she wouldn't plan it, at the same time, she doesn't have to be in charge of everything (in fact, very rarely these days does the maid of honor plan both the shower and the bachelorette party herself).

When you do bring it up with another bridesmaid, don't voice it as a rant against your MOH ("Ugh, Julie is so selfish! Does she think I don't deserve a last night of freedom?"). Instead, phrase it as a gentle suggestion: "I know Julie's been working really hard on my shower, and she's definitely going to need a break. I think it would be fun for all of us to get together and blow off steam at a bachelorette bash, but I don't think I can ask her to plan it." Your maid should get the hint. Also, if planning the shower is really causing your MOH undue stress, it wouldn't be out of line to ask your other maids (or your sister, or your mom) to try to help out a little.

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