10 Wedding Questions You Didn't Know to Ask

When it comes to the nitty-gritty of wedding details, leave no stone unturned.
by The Knot

Between venue tours and menu tastings, you've got a lot on your plate. With a packed schedule like that, on top of your everyday work and responsibilities, it's easy to let small details fall through the cracks, forget to ask about obscure logistics or wake up randomly in the middle of the night wondering if you're missing something. Trust us, you (with the help of your wedding party and planner) can totally handle any potential curveball that might happen at your wedding, so don't stress. But if you want to be an overachiever and start thinking ahead, here are a few day-of wedding questions couples frequently forget to ask before it's too late.

  1. 1. Who's responsible for lifting the bride's veil?

    Wedding veil tips during the ceremony
    photo by BohemiaDelMar

    Modern veil styles (like boho-chic flower crowns) have encouraged a rewriting of this tradition, but for a traditional veil style that's draped over the bride's face, there are two options. One is to have the father of the bride lift the veil when he gives her away, in a way, revealing her to her partner. The other is for the bride to keep her veil over her face during the ceremony, then have their partner lift it just before the first kiss.

  2. 2. What side are we supposed to stand on during the ceremony?

    Ceremony tips for the couple and guest seating
    photo by Mango Studios

    Traditionally, for a Christian ceremony, if you're in a church facing the altar, the bride stands on the left side and the groom on the right. Guests of the bride and groom follow suit, sitting on the side of whomever they know best or are related to. (Hint: Tell mutual friends to sit on the side with fewer people.) For Jewish ceremonies, it's the opposite (aka bride on the right, groom on the left). Many couples also opt for free seating, telling their guests to place themselves wherever they please. If neither of you feel affinity for any religion or tradition in particular, stand however works best for your ceremony.

  3. 3. What exactly does the couple do during the cake cutting?

    Wedding cake cutting tips
    photo by Nicole Marie Photography, LLC

    The cake cutting typically takes place after dinner, but you can also cut a quick slice right after your reception entrance or the toasts wrap up. Draw attention to the event by asking your bandleader or DJ to make an announcement (or one of you can do this). If you have older guests who might be leaving early, cut your cake near the beginning of your reception or right after dinner. Hold your cake cutting tool of choice together and cut into the bottom layer of the cake—your cake baker or caterer can give you a brief tutorial before game time. You don't need a perfect slice, just enough to give each other a bite.

  4. 4. How should the wedding party travel to the reception?

    Wedding transportation tips
    photo by Jacqueline Patton Photography

    You and your partner might have the perfect ceremony exit planned, but don't forget you're also responsible for getting your wedding party to the reception. If you're going casual and want them to simply drive over, let everyone know this beforehand so they can carpool or organize transportation ahead of time.

  5. 5. Where should you put your engagement ring during the ceremony?

    What to do with your engagement ring during the ceremony
    photo by Joanna Tano Photography

    Wear your engagement ring on your right hand or have someone you trust hold it for you. If you want to wear your engagement ring for the reception, you can put it on after the ceremony. For Jewish weddings, it's fine to wear your engagement ring and then exchange wedding bands if you want to keep with tradition. Also remember: The wedding band is usually worn closest to your heart (first on your finger) on your left hand.

  6. 6. Does the bride really need someone to hold the dress in the bathroom?

    Tips for wedding dress wear during the reception
    photo by Clay Austin Photography

    You've likely seen this stunt done in romantic comedies, and whether or not you'll have to get this sort of royal treatment depends on the dress. A full-length ball gown will probably require an extra set of hands to hold up the skirt while you do your thing. Trust us—the cost versus the benefit on this is a no-brainer. But if you're sporting a silk sheath and a group bathroom trip makes you cringe, go ahead and fly solo.

  7. 7. Is there a right way to do the first kiss?

    Wedding ceremony kissing etiquette
    photo by Sea Light Studios

    We probably don't need to tell you to keep it PG, but your first kiss as a married couple definitely doesn't have to be just a peck. Do what comes naturally to you both as long as you don't catch your partner by surprise or do anything you'll regret in a few years when you're rewatching your wedding video.

  8. 8. When should the bride take her veil off after the ceremony?

    Wedding veil tips for the ceremony and reception
    photo by Photo by Basia

    Everyone loves to talk about the veil, but nobody tells you exactly when to take it off. It's perfectly okay to wear the veil for the entire reception (if you've got it, flaunt, right?), but if you want to go veil free for the party, there are a few optimal times to take it off. The first is right after the ceremony (have your hairstylist show a bridesmaid how to do this without messing up your 'do); another is after taking formal portraits between ceremony and reception; and the third is after the first dance while your guests are eating. Once it's off, stow it in your bridal suite or, if you're not worried about spilling on it, drape it decoratively over your reception chair.

  9. 9. What's the best way to greet guests—besides a receiving line?

    How to greet wedding guests without a receiving line
    photo by Emily Jean Images

    We get it—you don't want to stand around after the ceremony in an assembly line. Instead, greet your guests during the reception by stopping by each table during the first course. Just make sure you have time to eat too. Also, make a short speech thanking guests for coming and give a shoutout to vendors and parents (or anyone else who helped plan and pay for the celebration). While this moment with the mic shouldn't take the place of personal interaction with guests, it can be a great way to let everyone know how much they mean to you.

  10. 10. Can you take your shoes off at any time during the reception?

    Bridal shoe tips and etiquette
    photo by Powers Photography Studios

    We've all been to weddings where guests cut loose on the dance floor and ditch the uncomfortable footwear for bear feet or flats. However, the thought of stepping on something sharp (or getting stepped on by a stiletto) and risking an injury early on in the night is a little too much for us to endorse going barefoot. Instead, bring a pair of flats or snazzy sneakers for dancing. If you're getting married in the summer, have baskets of flip-flops for your guests to slip into before they hit the dance floor.

  11. For your next planning steps, create a free, personalized wedding website to keep your guests informed (and excited!) about your plans, and a time-saving Guest List Manager to organize your attendees. Even better? You can sync your Guest List Manager and wedding website to update everything at once.

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