The People You Definitely Don’t Need to Invite to Your Wedding

Trying to cut down your guest list? You can probably start with these people.
by Sophie Ross

Creating your guest list is no easy feat. Between family members on both sides, friends, close colleagues and distant relatives your mom insists you invite, there’s a good chance you’ll find your list rapidly growing far past the count you originally envisioned.

But when it comes down to it, there are likely several people you aren’t actually obligated to invite, even though you might feel like you are. And while it may sound harsh, we totally give you permission to cut the below if your long-winded guest list is preventing you from booking that dream venue.

Friends You Haven’t Kept in Touch With

Maybe you have a former best friend you played soccer with all throughout middle and high school but ultimately fell out of touch with. The two of you have known each other for years, so the thought of leaving her out might seem strange. But it’s more than likely she doesn’t even know your partner (awkward), and you definitely don’t need to invite someone who’s essentially turned into a stranger over the years.

Miscellaneous Social Media “Friends”

When you announced your engagement, it’s likely you had tons of commenters and congratulators coming in hot from every direction. But between Instagram and Facebook, you probably have more followers and “friends” than you actually have in real life (it’s just a fact of life). It’s nice to receive a kind note from someone you don’t know very well, but it’s certainly not a reason to invite them.

Those Family Friends

Aka, your parents’ pals you’ve only met a few times. If it feels like your parents’ social circle is bigger than yours (it happens to the best of us) and your guest list feels like it’s being weighed down with way too many satellite family friends, sit down with your parents and explain that you’d prefer to keep it intimate. It can be an uncomfortable situation (especially if your parents are putting money toward the wedding), but if you talk it out together, you’ll have the opportunity to cut down the list as a team and avoid as much awkwardness as possible.

Random Coworkers

Yes, you may interact with them every day and spend more time with your deskmates than anyone else (maybe even including your future spouse). And, of course, you’d like to avoid any office awkwardness surrounding your wedding if you ultimately choose not to invite them. But when it comes down to it, you’re not obligated to invite your colleagues that you only interact with because you have to. The ones that you hang out with frequently outside of work will probably expect an invite (of course!)—but other than that, feel free to skip the ones you don’t have much of a relationship with out in the real world.

Really Distant Relatives

Yes, you’ll likely be compelled to invite many, many faraway family members and distant relatives that you don’t interact with much. But really think hard about some of the names that you can’t even put a face to it. If you say, “Who’s that again?” when your mom mentions Great Uncle Sonny, it’s probably safe to say you can skip that invite.

Anyone You Consider a Frenemy

Maybe you run in the same social circle as someone, but it’s an open secret among your mutual friends that the two of you don’t really get along. And while she counts as an acquaintance that may have been invited to another nonwedding-related event, your wedding is the perfect time to pick and choose the vibes you want. If someone brings only bad ones, you have no obligation to send an invite their way. (Do you really want to run the risk of receiving backhanded compliments on your wedding day? Probably not.)

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