Is There Such a Thing as Too Many Bridesmaids? Here's Our Take

How many is too many?
The Knot
Updated Feb 01, 2019

When it comes to picking your wedding party, we're in the party (get it?) of believing there aren't any rules. Of course, there are certain factors to consider (you probably don't want to be planning and coordinating a bachelorette party with 80 people), but overall, we think you should have as many—or as few—members of your wedding party as you want. Here's why.

There's no prescribed amount.

Don't listen to people who tell you there"s a "sweet spot," or your mother who repeatedly encourages you to stick to a number between "5 and 10." Tradition may state that the number of attendants you have is determined by the size and type of your wedding (for example, a formal wedding with more than 200 guests may have up to 12 attendants). But tradition is made to be broken—you should have however many you feel comfortable with, no matter the dress code or guest list size of your wedding. Stick to your gut.

You don't have to have the same amount of attendants as your partner.

To make things "aesthetically pleasing," some couples might choose to coordinate the number of attendants they have on each side, but this certainly isn't mandatory or important in the least. If your spouse wants to include their 10 really good friends from high school, but you're only having your three close cousins, don't worry about making sure you're even. It'll still look perfect—we promise.

You don't have to pick someone you don't want to.

That said, if you really do want to have the same amount as your partner, is it really worth picking someone to be in your wedding party that you wouldn't have included otherwise? Being an attendant is an honor and a commitment, and you shouldn't pick—or in the same vein, cut—anyone for the sake of optics.

It's okay to have zero.

Yes, really. If you feel like you're not close enough to anyone to ask or just don't want a wedding party—or on the other hand, close with too many people to choose—it's totally normal to simply forego having bridesmaids altogether. While some people's feelings might be hurt, they'll get over it, and you'll be having the wedding you want, which is the most important thing. And even if you don't have a wedding party, that definitely doesn't mean you can't have a shower or bachelorette party. Which brings us to our last point...

It's your wedding.

Not to state the obvious, but this is the time to carry out your vision (and no one else's). It's okay to be a little selfish and choose two bridesmaids over 25, or vice versa (much to your mother's chagrin). As long as you have the people you want standing next to you at the altar, that's all that matters.

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