Put These Sikh Wedding Traditions on Your To-Do List
Check out these customs for your religious celebration.
Photo: JuMi Story
,Design: Natalie Romine
A religion that emphasizes the importance of oneness and love, it's no surprise that a Sikh wedding is such a sentimental and beautiful affair. With that being said, if you're engaged and a part of the Sikh community you need to know what traditions to follow so you can honor your beliefs appropriately. (You can also keep reading even if you're a curious guest attending the Sikh wedding events of a loved one.) To help you gain more understanding of these unions, we reached out to experts to break down Sikh wedding rituals step by step. See what elements you already knew about and ones you didn't so you feel prepared.
Want more nuptial knowledge? Check out these global wedding customs that are sure to wow you. Also, we have a fun fact for you. By logging into your account on The Knot and clicking the heart icon, you can save images, articles and more while you read our content. Then, when you're ready to refer back to what you loved, access your favorites to help you plan.
Sikh wedding traditions in this story: History | Prewedding | Attire | Ceremony | Reception | Food, Drinks & Desserts | Postwedding
A Brief History of Sikh Wedding Traditions
Puneet Kaur Sandhu, a wedding consultant and senior state policy manager at the Sikh Coalition, provides some background Sikh weddings. "Sikh wedding traditions are centuries old, with many rooted in the Punjab region of India where Sikhism began over 500 years ago. While the religious heart of a Sikh wedding is the Anand Karaj—a ceremony grounded in humility, simplicity, and service—many of the colorful pre and postwedding events come from Punjabi wedding culture. Today, how traditional or modern a wedding looks often depends on the couple and their families."
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Another detail you should know is how long a traditional Sikh wedding is. Typically, the religious part of the ceremony is about 45 minutes, but how many days is a Sikh wedding? Overall, including the prewedding, day-of and postwedding events, the celebrations can last three to five days, depending on the customs involved.
Prewedding Sikh Traditions
Like many in religions and cultures, the joyous festivities start before the couple is officially married. Below are the numerous Sikh prewedding traditions you can expect to see.
Pre-Engagement Ceremony
Simrin Dhillon, the principal photographer and vice president at Banga Studios, says there's always an engagement ritual marking the union of the two families, sometimes called a roka ceremony. "It's an intimate gathering where blessings are exchanged, gifts are shared, and both families formally agree to the marriage. The word 'roka' translates 'to stop' in English, symbolizing the moment the search for a life partner comes to an end," she says.
Sahe Chithi
Jessie Khaira, the founder of Jessie Khaira Events who's been Indian wedding planning since 2003, says the sahe chithi, also known as saha chithi, is like a Sikh wedding invitation. "Traditionally, the bride's family delivers an invitation to the groom's family, officially inviting them to solemnize the wedding. This marks the bride's transition into her new life and signifies the formal step of bringing both families together," she adds.
Maiyaan Ceremony
"The maiyaan is a joyful prewedding ritual in Sikh traditions where family and friends gather to bless the couple by applying turmeric paste to their faces, arms and legs. Because of the rich yellow color of the turmeric paste, families often wear yellow and celebrate with bright colors on this day," says Sandhu. This ritual is also called a haldi ceremony at Hindu weddings. Also, this fun custom is usually combined with other Indian wedding traditions, like the mehndi ceremony.
Jago
The lively jago Sikh wedding tradition, which is also spelled jaggo, happens the night before the nuptials. "Family members dance and sing with decorated pots (gaggar) lit with candles. Nowadays, it's common to see pots lit with LED lights or made of Starbucks cups due to modern adaptations and brides incorporating personalized touches. It symbolizes awakening the community to celebrate and creates an atmosphere of joy and festivity," says Khaira.
Traditional Sikh Wedding Attire
Not all Indian wedding attire, Sikh or otherwise, is the same. Here's what to wear to a Sikh wedding as a to-be-wed or guest.
Traditional Sikh Bride Attire
"A Sikh bride typically wears a salwar kameez or lehenga in auspicious Indian wedding colors, like red, maroon or deep pink that represent prosperity, passion and new beginnings. The outfit is often crafted from luxurious fabrics like silk or velvet, richly adorned with zari work (gold thread embroidery) embroidery, handwork or gota patti (appliqué embroidery)," says Dhillon. Besides the Sikh wedding dress, Dhillon says you can expect to see a bride wearing a dupatta draped over her head as a sign of respect in the gurdwara (the place of worship in Sikhism) and that it's often embroidered along its borders.
Traditional Sikh Groom Attire
"A traditional Sikh groom's outfit reflects regal elegance and deep spiritual meaning. He typically wears a sherwani in rich, warm tones, like ivory, cream, gold or deep red, often intricately embroidered with gold or silk thread," says Dhillon. The groom usually wears churidar pants and a chandni or palla (scarf) draped over their shoulder. In the same or coordinating hue as the sherwani, a Sikh wedding head covering called a dastaar or turban is worn to represent one's faith, respect and identity. As a turban adornment, a kalgi, which is a bejeweled or feathered decoration, is added to the front and symbolizes valor, leadership and prestige.
The last item you'll see with a Sikh groom is a ceremonial sword called a kirpan. "This represents the groom's faith, responsibility and commitment to protecting justice. It's carried as part of the Panj Kakkar (or Five K's) which are the five articles of faith that initiated Sikhs (Khalsa) wear at all times. Even noninitiated Sikhs, who don't traditionally wear a dastaar, have a kirpan on their wedding day," says Sandhu. "Carried respectfully during the wedding, it's both a spiritual reminder and a mark of the groom's commitment to upholding Sikh values in his new role as a husband," adds Dhillon.
Traditional Sikh Guest Attire
For guests, the wedding attire isn't as intricate. "Guests should cover their heads inside the gurdwara out of respect. Women can wear colorful outfits, while men wear formal suits or kurta pajamas with scarves or turbans. Everyone, including vendors, must have their heads covered inside of the darbar hall," says Khaira.
Sikh Wedding Ceremony Traditions
Don't know what Sikh wedding rituals happen on the day-of? Below is the Sikh wedding ceremony, explained in-depth by experts.
Anand Karaj
The Anand Karaj Sikh wedding ceremony means "blissful union." This celebration is in a gurdwara in front of the Guru Granth Sahib, which is the Sikh holy scripture. The following customs are what happens during this ceremony.
Groom's Arrival and Milni
Similar to the baraat, a popular Indian wedding ceremony entrance, the groom processes with his family and is welcomed by his partner's family. Next, Khaira says short wedding prayers, called ardas or ardās, are done. "This is followed by a ceremony called the milni, where elders from both sides exchange garlands and greetings, and represents the formal joining of the two families. Next, is a communal breakfast, which emphasizes hospitality and starting the day with gratitude and togetherness," she explains.
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Unique Ceremony Seating
After the groom arrives, he must walk to the front of the congregation and sit on the floor (pillows are often used) inside of the gurdwara. Shortly after, his partner makes their entrance and sits next to him, which represents equality and strong partnership.
Ardas
"The ceremony begins with ardas, a collective, communal prayer that seeks blessings, guidance and protection from the divine. Ardas is a standing prayer that anchors the wedding in spirituality, reminding everyone present that the union isn't only between two people but also between their families and the divine," says Sandhu.
Kirtan
The kirtan part of the ceremony is when hymns or spiritual poems, called shabads, are performed. "These are sung by ragis (musicians) from the Guru Granth Sahib, praising divine love and guidance. The singing sets a meditative, devotional tone and highlights the idea that marriage is a spiritual journey, not merely a social contract," explains Sandhu.
Palla Ceremony
For this heartwarming custom, it's tradition for the bride's father or family member to take one end of the groom's palla and place it into the bride's hands. "This symbolizes the joining of the couple in mutual responsibility, respect and shared destiny, preparing them to walk together in life guided by faith," says Sandhu.
Laavan
Also spelled laavaan and lavan, Sandhu says this ritual is at the heart of the Anand Karaj. "The laavan are the four hymns composed by Guru Ram Das, the fourth Sikh Guru. During each hymn, the couple walks in a clockwise circle around the Guru Granth Sahib, with the groom leading and the bride following. Each round reflects a stage of spiritual development in marriage. The circling signifies the couple's devotion to center their marriage on the teachings of the Guru. Once the couple completes their laavan, they are officially married," she adds.
Below, Dr. Sandeep Singh, a board member of the Sikh Coalition, explains each laav in more detail.
- First Laav: "This emphasizes righteous living. The Guru teaches that life is more than ritual or material pursuits (maya) that distract us from the Divine. It calls upon the couple to leave behind the past, embrace a new beginning and establish their marriage on a spiritual foundation with daily practice at its core."
- Second Laav: "The second laav focuses on connecting with the inner self. The Guru urges us to overcome ego and recognize the presence of the Divine both within and around us. When the Guru truly becomes the center of the marriage, joy naturally fills the relationship."
- Third Laav: "This laav describes the state of vairaag (longing in separation), where the soul yearns deeply for union with the Divine. This longing is compared to the intense love one feels when apart from a beloved. Guru Sahib teaches that true love and liberation are experienced within the company of the holy (Saadh Sangat)."
- Fourth Laav: "The final laav marks the stage of peace and union. The mind becomes calm, content, and united with the Divine. At this stage, one no longer chases worldly desires but lives in harmony with the Divine. For the couple, this represents the merging of two lives into one—two bodies sharing one soul, with their marriage infused with Divine love."
Closing Blessings
At this point, more ardas are performed along with a reading of a hukamnama, which is a verse chosen at random from the left-hand side page of the Guru Granth Sahib. "This final blessing guides the couple with wisdom for their new journey. The congregation joins in, affirming the union with communal prayer and support," says Sandhu.
Ceremony Food
After the ceremony has concluded, more food is provided. The karah prasad is a sweet given to everyone and represents unity and distribution of blessings. If the couple doesn't want to have a reception, there's also a communal vegetarian meal served, referred to as langar, at the gurdwara. "By Sikh tradition, this meal is always vegetarian, simple and prepared by volunteers. Serving langar at weddings reflects the values of equality, humility and community. Everyone sits together on the floor and eats the same food regardless of background," says Sandhu.
But why is langar vegetarian? "Serving vegetarian food such as chole, paneer and saag ensures that people of all faiths and dietary restrictions can partake without concern, reflecting the Sikh values of inclusivity, compassion and hospitality," explains Dhillon.
Sikh Wedding Reception Traditions
Receptions aren't a requirement in Sikh wedding tradition, so whether or not you have one is up to you. Keep reading to learn how modern couples celebrate after the Anand Karaj. (Psst. If you and your partner want to have a reception, find the right Indian wedding venue for you here.)
Optional Receptions
"Receptions are a more modern addition rather than something deeply rooted in Sikh heritage. However, if you look at the cultural heart of Punjab, no celebration is complete without the energy of bhangra and giddha. These dances are more than performances; they're expressions of pure joy, cultural pride and the communal spirit that makes Punjabi weddings unforgettable," says Dhillon.
If an upbeat reception sounds like your type of party, head to The Knot Vendor Marketplace. There you'll find wedding pros ready to make your Sikh wedding reception come to life. Use the search bar or filters for your desired vendor category to get who and what you need to fit your wedding style and budget.
Traditional Sikh Wedding Food, Drinks and Desserts
One of our favorite customs among all religions and cultures are wedding food traditions. None of the food or beverages below are specific to the Sikh religion, but they are edible and drinkable items you'll most likely taste at a Sikh wedding.
A Feast of Tasty Flavors
"Food at a Sikh wedding is a true feast of North Indian Punjabi flavours, rich in spices, textures and aromas, celebrating the agricultural abundance of Punjab," says Dhillon. Sandhu says you can expect to see buffet-style feasts with a large variety of dishes available. Roti, chicken korma and tandoori paneer tikka are some of the delicious dishes offered at a Sikh wedding.
No Alcoholic Beverages
"Traditionally, alcohol doesn't align with Sikh religious values and isn't present at weddings. However, many receptions and prewedding events adapt to cultural practices and serve alcohol," says Khaira. Sandhu says there are some refreshing nonalcoholic drinks that can be served, such as sweet or salted lassi (a yogurt-based beverage) and masala chai (spiced tea).
Mouthwatering Desserts
"Traditional sweets such as gulab jamun, jalebi, laddoo and pinnis hold special significance. These treats are often prepared with care by family members, using recipes passed down through generations. The act of making them is just as meaningful as serving them," says Dhillon. It's typical for the sweets to be prepared at a family member's home before the wedding and is a chance for loved ones to spend time with one another.
Sikh Postwedding Traditions
Just because the couple is officially married doesn't mean there aren't more celebrations in store. Below are two more ways the Sikhs honor a marital union.
Doli
Also called the vidaai or bidaai, the doli or dholi Sikh wedding ritual is when the bride makes her emotional farewell after the ceremony or reception and leaves her family home to join her new home with her partner. "Traditionally, the bride leaves in a doli (a decorative palanquin carried by family), but today the bride's departure is usually in a car. The doli honors the bride as her family lovingly sends her off to start a new chapter. Even though the physical palanquin is no longer common, the emotional and cultural significance remains strong," explains Sandhu.
Phera
Similar to the pag phera done in the Hindu community, the phera is when the newlyweds visit the bride's parental home a few days after the wedding. There's usually a meal and blessings offered during this custom. "This tradition emphasizes that while the bride is married, her bond with her family remains unbroken," says Dhillion.
