How to Send a Wedding RSVP Reminder In a Polite Way

You did everything you were supposed to. You set an RSVP deadline and put it in an easily-visible spot on your wedding invitations and your wedding website, but you still haven't received a response from every guest. That's why you should know what a wedding RSVP reminder is. Sent by the couple, this message lets loved ones know the deadline for RSVPs is coming soon or has passed, and urges them to confirm if they'll be attending the wedding. Communicating with wedding guests doesn't have to be a huge inconvenience; just use our tips and tricks for how to remind people to RSVP for your wedding below.

In this article: When to Send an RSVP Reminder | How to Remind Guests to RSVP | RSVP Reminder Wording | How to Keep Track of Wedding RSVPs

When to Send an RSVP Reminder

We suggest sending a "please RSVP" message about one week before the deadline and, if needed, a second note one week after the deadline. If you're unsure about what deadline to give your potential guests, read about when wedding RSVPs should be due to put yourself on the right track.

How to Remind Guests to RSVP for a Wedding

Asking someone if they'll be attending your wedding is one thing, but knowing a nice way to say "please RSVP" is another. Here are our top tips for sharing a RSVP wedding reminder without ruffling feathers.

Talk to Loved Ones In Person

If the close family members and friends you see regularly haven't responded yet, consider reminding them to RSVP in person. But where do you have someone send RSVPs to? If you're collecting online RSVPs, your loved ones can simply go on their phones and submit their responses in seconds. If you're doing paper RSVPs, bring an extra response card with you the next time you see them and write down your loved one's response so you can add it to your guest list manager later.

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Call Potential Guests

Wondering how to remind someone to RSVP for your wedding another way? Well, you should know that a phone call is in line with guest communication etiquette. A phone call is personal, since the guest can hear the (friendly) tone of your voice. By talking over the phone, you won't run the risk of your request getting misinterpreted as aggressive or insincere (like it might as a wedding RSVP reminder text).

We recommend you and your partner tackle this task together—you call your friends and family while your partner calls theirs. Also, avoid going straight into asking them to RSVP when you call. Instead, ask them how they're doing, then lead into talking about the RSVP. Most likely, your guests didn't realize they missed the deadline, so a gentle reminder will help get things back on track.

Display It Front and Center on Your Wedding Website

The most direct way to remind guests to RSVP for the wedding is putting the RSVP date on the front page of your wedding website. This is one of the few details you can add on your wedding website and your invitations. Simply write, "We can't wait for you to celebrate with us. RSVP by [insert date] so we can get the party started!" To ensure that there are no hiccups, add RSVP instructions next to the reminder too. To cover all your bases, also include the date and instructions on the wedding website FAQ page.

Send an Email or Text

We know some people don't want to deal with an awkward phone conversation, so emailing or texting a reminder is a valid option. This doesn't mean you should create a group chat or send a mass email to everyone who has missed the deadline, since this can cause some embarrassment among loved ones. Instead, reach out with a cheerful and personal RSVP reminder message to each guest, letting them know that the deadline has passed, but that you would love to have them at your wedding. Mention that their prompt response is needed for you to get a proper headcount.

For those that want to use social media for their RSVP reminder, don't send group messages or make a post tagging guests that haven't responded. If you've been transparent about your wedding planning process online, an appropriate alternative is making a post or story with a subtle mention of the deadline. This way, you target your social media-savvy loved ones without making them feel publicly singled out.

Photo: The Knot Wedding Website

RSVP Reminder Wording

One of the most popular wedding RSVP questions we get is, "How should I phrase the RSVP reminder?" To answer this common inquiry, we crafted some wording templates for different forms of communication as inspiration.

Wedding RSVP Reminder Email

Design: Falak Khoja

Send the below message to those you haven't heard from a week or a few days before the RSVP deadline. Remember that the email should be concise and have an upbeat tone.

Hi [guest's name]!

We're only [insert number] weeks away from the big day (it's all happening so fast!). We recently met with our caterer and are excited about finalizing our menu, so whenever you have a moment, please let us know if you're able to make it—we'd love to celebrate with you. If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact us or check out our wedding website [insert link to site]. We hope to see you there!

Thank you!

Best,

[Your and your partner's names]

Design: Falak Khoja

For this wedding RSVP reminder email template, we kept it a little more generic and focused it on people who didn't make the deadline. Approach the situation with a sense of urgency without being confrontational.

Hello there!

There are only a few weeks to go before our special day and we're thrilled to be putting the finishing touches on our wedding. But before we can fully celebrate, our wedding planner needs to know which guests can or cannot make it. The RSVP deadline for mailing back your response cards has passed, so please complete this form on our wedding website [link to the digital RSVP form]. Thanks and we hope to see you soon!

Love,

[Your and your partner's names]

Wedding RSVP Reminder Cards

Design: Falak Khoja

Transform RSVP cards to reminders with The Knot Invitations. Customize the text on the cards and add a wedding QR code that allows loved ones to digitally RSVP. Then, mail these around the RSVP deadline. Feel free to steal our template below or use other RSVP card wording examples.

Kindly respond by [wedding date], by mail, scanning the QR code or on our wedding website at [wedding website URL].

Wedding RSVP Reminder Text

Design: Falak Khoja

Need a RSVP reminder text example? Use this casual message to easily get your point across.

Hi! Our wedding is coming up in a few short weeks, so we're sending over a friendly reminder that the RSVP deadline is only [insert number] days away from today. Please RSVP through our wedding website [link to the site] or by mail so we know if you'll be celebrating with us. Thank you!

Photo: The Knot Wedding Website

How to Keep Track of Wedding RSVPs

Lots of couples want to know how many guests RSVP "yes" to a wedding, but you need a way to track their responses efficiently first. If you don't have an organized guest list, it'll be hard to know who has sent in their RSVP already and who hasn't. Here's how to log both digital and paper RSVPs and what tools to use to help you.

Collect RSVPs Online

Before you can send an RSVP reminder, you'll have to find out which guests have already submitted their RSVP. If you're collecting RSVPs online through a wedding website, expect to receive guest responses quicker than through the mail. With The Knot RSVPs, all response statuses are automatically updated on your guest list manager and you can even filter guests by their RSVP status. Overall, this is the easiest way to keep track of responses, since the hard work is done for you.

Collect Paper RSVPs

You can use The Knot Guest List Manager to organize paper RSVPs too. Simply log into your account and select the pencil icon to update your guests' responses as well as note any special dietary requirements and other important details. Alternatively, some couples make a spreadsheet to keep their RSVP information. For this method, write down your guests' contact information (name, address and phone number), attendance response, meal choice and possible plus-one on the spreadsheet.

Sometimes guests return their RSVP cards without writing their name (yes, it happens more often than you think) or you can't understand their handwriting. Bypass this inconvenience discreetly by giving an assigned number to each guest and writing it on the back of their response card before mailing your invitations. To be even more subtle, write the assigned number in invisible ink and view it later under a UV light to reveal the text.